Mythical Creatures
by Two Girls One Account
Summary: Clary, (a dryad,) was recently expelled from her old school and now must attend Alicante Academy with her brother and his group of friends. What could go wrong?
1. Chapter 1: The Sorting Hat

**Yaaaaaayyyyyy we're so excited about this story! We've had this story planned for so long so it's really exciting to finally start writing it.**

 **The chapter's super long, so don't get your hopes that it will be this length every time. And honestly, don't expect a weekly update. We'll update as much as we can but with the probable length of the chapters and exams around the corner, a new chapter being written weekly is very unlikely.**

 **Anyway, please don't get offended because it's all just for shits and giggles. (Damn, it's been too long since I've written that)**

THE SORTING HAT

Clary threw her green duffle bag onto her bed and sat down with a huff, looking over to the bed across from her where Simon was reading Twilight.

"This isn't even accurate. Even assuming vampires do sparkle in the sun, why is it so much harder for them to survive on animal blood? We only drink it to survive. It doesn't even taste that great. Especially you humans, with your butter and your bacon, your blood is like 90% lard!"

"Simon," Clary said, ripping the book from his hands. "My blood is 90% rose water. I'm classy, bitch."

"Knock, knock." Clary turned to see John standing at the door, his closed fist tapping the wood gently. "I brought you something to liven up the room." He held out a small potted plant like it was a first place trophy he was presenting to his grandma. As if he was saying _aren't you so proud of me?_

Clary took the pot and examined the single stem growing from the grey dirt. "It's dead."

John shrugged. "I thought you could fix it, you know; use your cool Dryad-y powers?"

"No, John. It's fucking dead. It's been dead for years. Did you water it with vinegar? Is this a pepperoni?"

"I thought it was hungry."

"That's not how plants work, John. Do you even know anything about anything?" Clary tossed the plant out the window, pot and all. There was a crashing sound and a very loud "OUCH!" Clary gave no shits.

"Anyway," John took Clary by the arm and led her into the hall, her unpacking completely forgotten. "After all the stories I told about my badass sister, my friends really wanted to meet you." In the hall stood a small group of people, maybe half a dozen. Clary recognized Jordan as her brother's boyfriend. Everyone else was an unfamiliar face, though one boy with golden hair and matching eyes caught her eye. She thought he was cute until he opened his mouth.

"So I heard this rumour that Dryads don't grow leg or pubic hair. They just grow small tree branches."

"Excuse me," Clary tried to keep her voice down. "I am a garden Dryad. I'm not bound to a tree like I'm someone's bitch. And I don't grow tree branches. I grow flower buds like a fucking lady."

The blond boy smiled. "Do the buds bloom?"

"If you leave them there long enough," Clary said defensively. "Not that I would know," She said a bit more quickly. "It's just a rumor."

"So I hear you got kicked out of your last school. What did you do?" asked a boy standing next to Jordan. He was tall, with sharp blue eyes and short black hair. And from the tone of his voice, Clary could also tell that he was a dick.

Clary smirked. She wasn't ashamed of this story. "Yeah, I got kicked out on purpose. That school was a joke. At first, I thought I would do well at Mary Jane Nature Academy because, well, duh," she said, gesturing to her pale, slightly tinted green face. "Anyway, the school was a joke. One of the mandatory classes was Flower Picking 101. It was constantly suggested that we grow and smoke weed for extra credit. Most of the teachers were addicted to this new kind of cocaine you harvest from tree bark. Anyway, I had to get the hell out of there, so during 'recreational meditation time' I went and picked a flower from the Sacred Garden. Boom. Instant expulsion." Clary clapped her hands, smiling with almost evil satisfaction, like she had just murdered a man and thoroughly enjoyed it.

Everyone else seemed mildly disturbed, which didn't really bother Clary. Jordan cleared his throat, like he was getting ready to change the subject. "But what about your boyfriend?"

Clary's smile fell from her face. "Don't even mention him. He was such a butt plug. I was only really dating him because sometimes he brought me free yogurt. Also I got coconuts every full moon."

"Why only on the full moon?" the blond boy asked.

"He's a weretree," Simon called from inside the room, already choking on his laughter. Everyone started laughing. Which was totally called for, but Clary was still annoyed.

"Could he move when he was in tree form?" the blue eyed boy asked, wheezing between words.

Clary tried to hide her blush, which was hard since she blushed green. "No. He could kind of sway in the wind. Sometimes he could drop coconuts at will if he _really_ concentrated." Everyone continued to laugh. Clary even started to giggle a little. "He couldn't even change at will. Only on the full moon." She laughed harder. John fell on the floor.

"What was his name?" asked a girl with long black hair.

"Palmer," Clary snorted.

Jonathan checked his watch as he wiped a tear from his eye. "Oh shit," he said, suddenly alarmed. "We need to get to the auditorium."

"For what?" Clary asked, shutting her dorm room door behind her.

The Sorting Ceremony was a tradition at Alicante Academy, according to Jonathan. Its purpose was to sort the students into levels depending on their powers in order to place them in the correct classes. There were three levels; the Alphas, the Betas and the Omegas. Or as Jonathan called them, the Assholes, the Peasants and the Special Needs. Clary knew that John has been sorted into Alpha his last three years here, and there was no reason for a student to be demoted unless they had not improved at all since last year.

"You should have no problem getting into Alpha," John said, walking Clary to a row of seats where all his other friends were. She sat next to the blond boy, whose name she learned was Jace. John sat down at her right. "With your abilities and the pull you have since Mom and Dad both work here, they'll let you in no problem."

I asked what the difference was between the levels, and he said that it really just decides what gym class they put you in, because they can't have the Assholes kicking the Special Needs' butts on a daily basis.

Clary looked up and saw her dad, Luke, get on the stage at the front of the room. He tapped the microphone he held a few times to see if it was working, then spoke. "Everyone shut up." The room quieted immediately. "Welcome back to another year of torture and boredom. As per tradition, we will be starting off the year with the annual sorting ceremony. But since this is just the group of juniors and seniors, it's very rare that we have any new students. However, this year, my daughter, Clary, has transferred from Mary Jane Nature Academy," several people in the audience _boo_ ed loudly, "because she wanted to branch out." Luke smiled like he just delivered the joke of a century. The crowd was completely silent. Clary groaned, sinking down in her seat. Luke cleared his throat in discomfort. "Anyway, in the spirit of competition, we will be starting off with our newest addition to Alicante Academy. Clary, come up on stage." Luke smiled directly at her, though she wasn't sure how since she was at the very back of the auditorium and all the lights were pointed at the stage. Must be a werewolf thing. A spotlight suddenly flickered on, pointing directly at Clary. She could feel herself blushing. She hated it when she blushed. The green always clashed with the red. She looked like a walking beacon of Christmas as she stood and started shuffling in front of the legs of the people who sat next to her.

As she passed Jace, she felt him slap her ass, the clapping sound filled the quiet room and a few people started to laugh.

John punched him in the face, which seemed to hurt John more than Jace. "Hey, that's my sister."

"Yeah, that's my daughter," Luke called from on stage.

 _Oh Jesus fucking Christ,_ Clary thought, finally getting to the isle and walked up to the stage. Her first day and she's already daddy's little girl. Great.

Once she got on stage, she tried to clear her head. John said this would be easy. Just a simple demonstration of power.

Clary extended her hand, palm up, towards the audience. The audience let out a satisfying amount of _ooh_ 's and _ah_ 's as they watched her grow a simple rose from the palm of her hand. She tossed the rose to one of the judges, a slim woman with brown hair and pale skin, (whom she thought was the head mistress,) and smiled, bowing to the crown. Then she spread her arms wide and let a shower of pink flower petals rain over the auditorium. The crowd cheered, and Clary strutted off the stage confidently and retook her seat next to Jonathan.

"Was that last part too much? I don't want to look like I'm showing off. I really tried to tone it down," Clary whispered in her brother's ear.

"Are you kidding me?" John whispered back in a way that sounded like he was screaming very quietly. "That was pathetic. You've disgraced our family. Did you not know that this is literally the biggest pissing contest of the year? You're _supposed_ to show off."

"Well no one fucking told me that!"

"Thank you for that lovely presentation," Luke said, coming back on stage. "The judges have concluded that Clary Greymark will be classed as _Beta_ ," Luke chocked it out, like he was saying _Macbeth_ in a theatre.

Clary sat with her mouth wide open, unable to speak. John leaned in and patted Clary on the head. "Don't worry," he said in a consoling tone. "The rules state that if you challenge an Alpha and beat them, you get upgraded."

"Really?"

"Yeah, Simon's been trying for years."

Simon smiled at them, just as his name was called and he went up on stage. Clary thought that Simon was probably going to do some demonstration of strength or speed. He was a sorta kinda vampire. Simon's mother was bitten when she was pregnant with him, so he's basically a vampire, but he can walk in the sun and he ages like everyone else. So he's basically Blade. Except for one small detail.

Simon got up on stage, smiled at the audience, and morphed into a rat. It was so quick if you blinked you would have missed it. His small rat body scurried around the stage. He morphed back into a human and the crowd applauded politely. He walked over to a weight bench that was set up on the left of the stage and piled on some heavy looking weights onto the bar. "I will now lift 250 pounds. With one hand." The crowd cheered as Simon picked up the weight bar and lifted it a couple times before dropping back down. He bowed and walked off stage like he just won a million dollars.

Luke announced that he was Beta and no one was surprised.

Luke called up a girl named Isabelle Lightwood next, and the girl with the long black hair from earlier got up and walked to the stage. She was tall and quite pretty. Clary thought she might be a Siren or something.

Luke walked off stage and there were rattling sounds like someone was trying to jimmy open a lock, followed by a soft _clip clop_ as a small deer walked on stage. Clary had always liked deer. They were soft and delicate and- OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK SHE JUST TURNED INTO A HYENA WHY IS SHE RIPPING IT APART THERES BLOOD EVERYWHERE OH MY GOD

Clary sat frozen in her seat as Isabelle walked off the stage wiping blood from her face. Luke dragged the mauled deer carcase off of the stage and announced Isabelle as Beta. Clary wasn't sure what it would take to get into Alpha if that wasn't enough, because that was fucking nasty and horrifying.

A few more names were called before Luke called the name Maia Roberts. A girl who sat at the other end of the room stood and walked onto the stage carrying a large metal bucket.

Jace gagged next to her, trying to look away but his eyes kept wandering back to the stage. "I hate this part. She's so disgusting."

Clary rolled her eyes. "Don't be rude. I'm sure it's fine. You're just overreacting."

Maia got onto the stage and took the microphone from Luke, who looked like he was trying really hard not to get too close to her. Once he had handed her the mic, he took a bottle of hand sanitizer out of his pocket and proceeded cleanse his entire arm. "Can I have a volunteer from the audience?" Maia asked.

After a moment of silence, Clary started to feel bad. No one was raising their hand, so Clary started to, just to be polite. Just as she started to lift her hand, both John and Jace slapped her hand back down into her lap.

"Don't even think about it," John whispered.

"You'll thank us later," Jace said.

"Too bad," Maia mumbled and proceeded to dump out the contents of the bucket onto the floor in front of her. Jace tried his best to hold back his dry heaving.

"What is that?" Clary asked, squinting at the stage. She was at the very back so it was pretty difficult to see what was going on. "It kind of looks like-"

"It looks like exactly what it is," Jace interrupted. "It's fucking human shit. She's gonna roll around in human shit."

Just as Jace bent over to dry heave again, Maia's body shrunk down until she could barely be seen from where Clary was sitting. "Are you fucking kidding me," Clary muttered. She just turned into a fucking dung beetle.

Clary sat back and looked away, trying to focus on rubbing Jace's back so she wouldn't have to look at what was going on stage. "Are you ok?" she asked, leaning forward so he could hear. "Do you need a bucket? There's one on stage."

Jace's only response was to dry heave more violently.

Maia turned back into a human and she smiled at the completely silent crowd. "I love you, Simon Lewis!" She jumped face first into the crowd as though she was expecting everyone to swarm and catch her shit covered body. Everyone moved away quickly, and there was a loud cracking sound like bones breaking. Maia stood up, her jaw shifted a little too far to the left, and shouted something that sound either like "I'm ok" or "I'm so gay." Though after her declaration it was safe to assume that it was the first one.

The stage was thoroughly sanitized and Luke found a new microphone. A few more people went and demonstrated their power. There was a girl named Aline who could turn into and elephant. She was an Alpha. Jordan went next. He turned into an enormous wolf and slaughtered a rabid bear. Alpha. Alec was up next. There were targets set up around the room and Alec very impressively got a bullseye every time. He was classed as Alpha, which kind of surprised Clary. But then again, Hawkeye was an Avenger right? Magnus went. He did some Warlock shit. Alpha.

Luke called up a boy named Denis, who had been sitting next to Magnus. Once he was on stage, he yelled out to the crowd, "Have you ever seen a man pull a rabbit out of his anus?"

"Yes," Magnus called back, sounding severely annoyed. Denis ignored him. He then pulled a (surprisingly white) rabbit out of the back of his pants and set it down on the stage. The audience applauded and Denis walked off stage. Alpha.

 _Are you fucking kidding me?_ Clary thought. John must have seen her face because he leaned in and whispered, "Like I said, they don't demote you unless you really haven't learned anything. Denis was valedictorian last year, so that basically gives him a free pass to dick around and not have to worry about being demoted."

Denis walked towards the judges and handed the fluffy white rabbit to the judge in the middle, and winked.

John went next. He seemed kind of indifferent about the whole thing but when he got up on stage he still gave a pretty great show. He unsheathed his swords, (and by unsheathed, I mean he literally grew the blades out of his wrists. Nasty) and stood at the ready. No one seemed to know what was really going to happen until the loud rattling sound went off. The whole crowd practically jumped as they turned to see two men standing at the back of either isle, firing machine guns at John.

Clary sighed. _Fucking show off._

On stage, John was swinging his swords around too fast for anyone's eyes to follow, deflecting all the bullets as they came at him.

Once he was done showing off like a complete ass hole, he invited Jace on stage, (who stood from his seat with a big smile on his face, clearly excited about what was coming.) Once he was on stage, John handed him a gun and told him to shoot him anywhere. Clary understood why he hadn't asked her to do it. He knew she would have shot him right in the dick.

After three shots went off, one in the leg and two in the chest, John dug out the bullets and showed everyone how the holes closed up almost immediately. Alpha.

The boys returned to their seats.

Next was a boy named Sebastian Verlac. Clary heard someone stand up a few rows behind her and looked to see the boy. He was a tall glass of yum. Dark hair, dark eyes, perfect smile. _Hot damn. I would love to- oh shit, he's smiling at me. Smile back, Clary, smile back._ Clary smiled back at him. _Goddammit, he's gonna think you just ripped one._

"What are you doing?" John whispered to her, forcing her to look away from her future husband. She tried to say something, but John started talking again before she could. "That guy's bad news. Don't be his friend."

Clary rolled her eyes. Just because John had some petty rivalry with this guy didn't mean he wasn't attractive as _fuuuuuuuuuuuck_.

Sebastian got on stage and started prepping for whatever he was going to do. Jace let out a very derisive sound.

"What's with you?" Clary asked. Jace said nothing. "Ooooh, I get it. You're into him and you're upset that he won't get with you. That's why John hates him, because you guys are bros."

Jace turned his head to her slowly, like he needed to take some time to process what she said before he could address it. "You… You think I'm gay?"

"Well, I mean it's obvious that you take good care of yourself."

"Ooooh," Jace smirked. He sat up a bit straighter so he was looking down into her eyes. "So you think I'm attractive but you didn't want to address your sexual attraction and it's just easier for you to think I'm gay than admit you want to bang me. I get that a lot."

Clary rolled her eyes, but didn't admit that he was kinda right.

Clary looked back towards the stage, to Sebastian. He looked the same, but something seemed different. It took Clary a second to realize his shadow was gone.

The crowd gasped as they watched Sebastian's shadow move and walk on its own, completely separate from his body. The shadow walked towards the back of the room where Clary was sitting, and suddenly she was floating. She could feel arms around her, holding her bridal style, but there was no one there. She looked down and saw that Sebastian's shadow was holding hers, walking her up to the stage. She looked back to her friends and could have sworn she saw smoke coming out of Jace's nose. Once they were half way down the aisle, Clary was set back on the ground, and suddenly she was dancing. The shadow spun her and led her towards the stage. She danced up the steps and into Non-Shadow Sebastian's arms and he dipped her, kissing her on the tip of her nose. "I'm Sebastian," he said with a dazzling smile.

"Clary," she mumbled, trying not to get lost in his eyes.

"I know." The whole audience stood and applauded. Sebastian led Clary off stage with his hand around her waist. "I saw your performance earlier. Its total BS that you weren't classed as Alpha." He said the word "Alpha" in unison with Luke. They stopped at Clary's row and he smiled at her. "See you around, Poppy," he said, flicking a lock of her hair from her shoulder.

Clary went back and sat down with the biggest dumbass smile on her face.

"Poppy? Really?" John grumbled, clearly annoyed.

"I know," Clary blushed. "Isn't it so cute?"

"Whatever," Jace muttered angrily. "Anyone can do nicknames, Ginge."

"Last but not least, Jace Herondale," Luke said from the stage. The audience grumbled bitterly. Clearly they knew what was going to happen next.

Jace smiled and stood. "You think that shadow shit was cool? Just wait, little Ginge." He stretched his arms a few times before jogging up to the stage and took the microphone from Luke.

"Ladies and gentlemen. Maia. If you reach under your seats you'll find a fire-proof poncho. Thank you. Also, fuck you Verlac!"

Jace threw the microphone to the ground and took off his shirt. At first nothing happened, and Clary thought that maybe they needed the ponchos because his abs are fire. But then he turned, showing everyone his back where he had a very impressive tattoo of a set of dragon wings. The wings suddenly didn't look so two-dimensional. They began to peel from his back and suddenly they were real, flapping and bringing his body up into the air. He turned towards the crowd, smiled, and breathed fire.

 _Holy. Fucking. Shit._

Needless to say, Clary was glad she had put on her poncho.

Jace's wings retracted while he was still in mid-air. He summersaulted back down onto the stage and bowed. The audience stood, applauding.

Jace strutted off stage back towards Clary. She could barely hear Luke announce him as an Alpha over the roar of the audience.

People started to file out of the auditorium, since the sorting was over. Clary tried to walk towards the isle, but her foot caught on the base of one of the seats and she fell forward. Jace caught her, and she didn't realize until then that he was still shirtless.

He smiled down at her. "I know you did that on purpose just to touch my abs. Still wish I was gay?"

 **So there's our first chapter! hope you guys enjoyed it.**

 **Can you tell we hate Maia? Did we make it obvious enough?**

 **Just to clarify, in case you guys were wondering, John is basically Deadpool. Just for the sword thing, picture the very shitty Deadpool interpretation from the really shitty Wolverine movie from, like, 2009. You dig?**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


	2. Chapter 2: The Date Rape Drug

**So sorry this chapter took so long to update, but we've been procrastinating like it's our fucking job.**

 **Anyway, please enjoy. As you may have noticed, we changed our rating to M. You'll see why. No lemons. We're just disgusting human beings.**

THE DATE RAPE DRUG

Clary woke up the next morning to the sound of Simon's obnoxious snoring. She looked over at her roommate, who was hanging from the metal bar by his knees like a kindergartener on the playground. His arms hung limp around his head and drool was pooling in his hair and on the floor below him.

Clary smiled and walked over to her desk and opened the middle drawer after unlocking it with the key she kept around her neck. Once the drawer was open, she took out what she needed and walked over to the still sleeping Simon.

His mouth was already open. _Perfect._ She opened her tube of superglue and filled the plastic party store vampire teeth with the white substance. Once it was filled to the brim, Clary leaned over and stuck the fake vampire teeth to his real ones.

Simon's eyes snapped open just as the fake teeth had been pushed into place. The excess glue filled his mouth and he gagged, he squirmed around and kicked, which was a horrible idea, since he was hanging from his legs.

Simon fell, hitting his head off the floor below him and rolling onto his back. He ignored the head injury and immediately rolled over onto his hands and knees and began to gag, coughing up all the extra glue onto the floor. He turned his head just in time to hear the snapping of Clary's camera. Clary smiled and set the photo as her phone background.

"Come on, Lewis. We're going to breakfast." Clary grabbed her jacket and walked out of the room. Simon groaned and followed.

It's a short walk to the mess hall, which is good. If it were too long, the glue on Simon's face would have dried.

They sat down at their table across from Isabelle with their trays of food.

"Simon, are you ok? Why do your fangs look weird and… glow in the dark?" Izzy leaned forward and tapped Simon's teeth with her long fingernails.

John came and sat down next to Isabelle, setting his tray of food down on the table. He looked at Simon with a simultaneously confused and disgusted expression. "Dude, you look rabid. Are you feeling ok?"

Simon rolled his eyes, getting ready to respond when Jace sat down next to John.

"Whoa, Simon, I don't know if you know this but someone glued fake vampire teeth to your real teeth."

"Thank you!" Simon said, gesturing to Jace. "Someone finally-"

"And they came all over your face," Jace smirked.

Simon rolled his eyes, ignoring Jace and choosing instead to try and pry the plastic from his teeth. Clary tried not to smile as she ate her bowl of fruit, listening to him mutter about wishing he had longer fingernails.

"Hey, Poppy. Ready for your first day of classes?"

Clary looked up to see Sebastian standing over her with a cute smile on his face. She smiled back at him. "Yeah, I just got my schedule this morning," she said, holding up the piece of paper she had just gotten from Headmaster Penhallow on the way to the mess hall.

Sebastian leaned forward, glancing at the page before returning his eyes to Clary. "No way," he said with a smile. "We have homeroom together." He turned to the side and held out his arm, offering it to her. "Shall I escort the young flower to her class?" he said in a goofy British accent.

Clary smiled, standing and taking his arm. "You shall."

The two walked off together and Jace tried to hold down his breakfast. John also looked a little green.

"What's wrong, Jace? Are you jealous?"

Jace frowned, no longer gagging dramatically. "What?"

"Nothing," Simon smirked. "It's just that you seem kind of scared that they might fall in love and get married and ride into the sunset together with all of their beautiful babies."

"Go to hell, Cum-Face." Jace flipped his tray of food at Simon and stormed off.

Clary's first class was boring and horrible. Their teacher, Professor Morgenstern, was loud, rude, and didn't seem to notice that no one gave a single shit about his damn Mortal Subjects class. He was drawling on and on about Human history, and how even their past wars affected us. Clary couldn't help but roll her eyes. _How exactly did the Holocaust affect the Dryads?_

The class was bear, all grey walls and brown desks. The only thing that was really interesting to look at was their teacher's enormous head.

From what Clary could tell, Valentine Morgenstern had a super brain. Photographic memory, amazing at math, blah blah blah. All the things that would be so very useful to a teenage mortal trying to make their way through high school. Too bad no one really gives a shit here.

She couldn't keep herself entertained by talking to Sebastian, because any time anyone opened their mouth to so much as yawn, Valentine would call them out on it. So she kept her mouth shut and waited for the bell to ring.

Her next class would be more fun. Once Mortal Subjects was over, she left the class to head to Potions. Jace was waiting for her at the door, ready to walk her to her next class. _That's cute,_ Clary though.

When Clary asked, he simply said John had asked him to take her to her next class.

Potions was a lot more fun than Clary's last class. Their professor, Headmistress Penhallow, was much kinder than Valentine Morgenstern. She let us talk in class, for one. And her introduction to the class was just downright perfect.

Jia Penhallow simply walked into the class wearing a black cape that she held around her body like it was a shock blanket. She looked at the class and said in a deep voice, "turn to page 394." No one said anything, but Headmistress Penhallow pointed directly to Clary with a smile and said, "yeah, you get it!"

Clary wasn't sure how she had known that she had understood her joke at first, but Jace noticed her confusion and informed Clary that their professor possessed the rare ability to read minds.

Jia Penhallow had told her class that their only project for the day was to make a potion you already know how to make. Simple. Easy. Perfect.

Clary easily mixed together one of her favorite mixtures and poured the amber liquid into a cluster of vials that rested on the table, shoving a cork into each one after it was full.

Jace glanced over at what she was doing and picked up one of the vials. "What is this stuff?"

Clary shrugged. "I don't really have a name for it, but it's something I use to help me sleep. All you really have to do is smell it and it makes your pretty drowsy. I once made the mistake of actually drinking it to get out of one of my exams. I was out for about three days. John thought I was dead. I woke up 78 hours later in a coffin during my own funeral. Totally worth it though. I was excused from all of my exams."

Jace laughed and uncapped the vial, bringing it to his nose to take a whiff. "Smells like cinnamon. And daisies."

Clary shrugged. "Excuse me for liking when things smell nice." She collected her small vials and walked around the class, offering many people a vial. She handed one to Sebastian with a smile. He smiled back, and their hands touched for a moment when Clary passed it to him. She turned away before he could see her blush, and made her way to Headmistress Penhallow with the last vial.

Jia turned towards her student and took the vial from her. "Clary, yes, thank you for making this potion. It's great, really. But unfortunately, I need you to dispose of it since technically it could be used as a date rape drug. What do you mean you can't? Why would you do that? Well go find them, girl!" She said, butting in every time Clary tried to say something. The headmistress spun her around and sent her back towards the group of people she had been talking to before to collect all of her small vials.

Clary's next class was boring. It seemed that the only thing she missed about her old school was the art class. Here at Alicante Academy, her mother was the art teacher, and there wasn't anything she had to say that Clary hadn't heard before.

Her mother assigned Clary to Sebastian, who seemed to be in all of her classes, so that she could help him with his art assignments. After the small drawing exercise they did at the beginning of class, it because fairly evident to Jocelyn that Seb could not, in fact, art. At all.

Clary's mother promised to give her extra points in the class for helping him. Not that she needed it.

Clary walked to her last class of the day. Gym. Great.

Clary wasn't sure how she felt about the class, since she was only really escaping from one parent to walk into the clutches of another.

Luke told all his students to file into the bleachers as he stood at the base in his grey tshirt and black track pants. What a fucking gym teacher.

"Alright class. This semester, we will be spending three days a week in the gym and two days a week in the classroom. Health class is just as important as physical exercise and I intend to have you thoroughly seasoned in both by the end of the semester." Luke's eyes moved to someone sitting in the back, who had apparently raised their hand. Not that Clary bothered to look. It's just so much work to turn all the way around, ya know? Luke pointed to them, giving the person permission to speak.

"So you'll teach about, like, sex and stuff?"

Luke sighed, rubbing his temples. "Yes, I'll be teaching you about… sex and stuff. It's important to know about your own bodies and desires-"

Clary groaned loudly, letting her head fall into her hands. Luke only ignored her.

Next to her, John raised his hand. Luke pointed him so he could speak. "Yeah, do we have to show up for some of the classes if we're already… thoroughly seasoned in the curriculum?" John smirked.

Clary gagged so intensely she thought she might shit herself.

Luke began to gag too, turning a new shade of green every time he held back his lunch. The gym teacher shook his, trying to catch his breath. "That was fucking disgusting. I need a few hours to recover from that. Holy fuck. Class dism-"

"WAIT!"

"Oh Jesus fucking Christ," Luke braced himself against a wall just as Simon came jumping down from the bleachers onto the gym floor.

"I challenge Jace Herondale to a duel! If I win, I become an Alpha!"

"And when you lose, you'll be fucking humiliated," Luke called from the side, still holding down his vomit.

"None sense!" Simon yelled, flexing his none existent muscles. "I'm gonna win this time! I can feel it in my balls!"

Jace extended his wings and flew down the three steps to Simon. _Fucking showoff._ Once he reached the gym floor, he ripped off his shirt, exposing his glorious- nay, magnificent- nay, legendary abs.

Clary tried to keep her jaw from hitting the floor. Jace faced Simon and exhaled a small puff of smoke from his mouth.

Simon squealed like a pig about to be butchered and jumped back about ten feet. Jace smirked and walked back over to wear Clary sat and leaned over, wiping the drool from the corner of her mouth and smirked. "You should try to keep your panties dry," he murmured in his low, husky voice.

 _Too late._

 **Please remember to review and let us know what you thought.**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


	3. Chapter 3: I can show you the right way

**Yeah, we know it's been like a million years since we've updated... Sorry?**

I can teach you the right way

John woke up that morning feeling like doing something nice for his sister. He went with Jace down to the cafeteria and bought Clary her favorite kind of wheat bagel (which is actually nasty) and kale jam (again, ew.) He bought a coffee for himself, (Jace bought a lambs leg. For breakfast. Really dude?) and made his way back to Clary's room so he could give her breakfast in bed. _I'm such a great brother,_ he thought. He would have pat himself on the shoulder is his hands weren't full. _Clary never does this kind of stuff for me. She doesn't even deserve this goddamn bagel. Maybe I should just fucking eat it._ John thought of how wheat bagel and kale jam would taste, and decided it would be better to just be a good brother instead.

They reached the third floor landing and walked across the hall to Clary's room. Being her brother, he never considered knocking. But once he opened the door, the first thing he thought was _why the hell didn't i knock._

Clary lay on the floor, gagged and wearing nothing but leather panties and a metal bra. Her arms were bound behind her back and she was bent over her bed. Simon stood behind her in what looked like a Legolas costume spanking her with a dildo. "This is what you get!" Simon yelled, unaware that he now had an audience. "This is your punishment for messing with me, you whore!"

John would have said something, anything, if it weren't for the overflow of vomit spewing from his mouth. He puked up his coffee all over the grey carpet.

Simon finally stopped and looked up to see John bent over, now dry heaving loudly, and Jace exhaling an intimidating amount of smoke. He dropped the dildo and backed away from Clary. "Guys, I can explain. It's not what it looks like!"

Clary tried to say something, but her words were muffled by the ball gag.

Simon rushed forward, grabbing Jace by the shoulders. "You have to let me explain. She needed to be puni-" Before he could finish, Jace exhaled, and… well… burned off Simon's eyebrows. And possibly some of his face.

John grabbed Jace by the arm and dragged him away from the room, trying to hold back another wave of dry heaving.

"Where are we going?" Jace asked.

"We're going to talk to Headmistress Penhallow. They can't be allowed to stay in a room together."

OoOoOoO

By the time they reached Jia's office, John had stopped dry heaving and Jace had stopped accidentally breathing fire.

They opened the door to the Headmistress's office without knocking (thank god there was no BDSM gear this time) and sat down in front of her desk.

Jia looked up from her book and looked unsurprised to see them.

"Hello, Jonathan. Hello, Jonathan. What brings you two here? Oh that's just disgusting, but unfortunately I can't change them rooms. No, there are no rules against co-ed rooms at this school since there's just so much gay here. Simon is sterile anyway. Yeah, I guess you didn't need to know that. Oh no, don't worry. They aren't together. They're just having a harmless prank war."

"But how did you-" John started, but Jia cut him off.

"I read his mind yesterday in the hall. His idea wasn't bad, but Clary's next prank is going to be _golden._ Yes, Jace, you can calm down now. They aren't together. Clary is still single. But I know Sebastian Morgenstern is showing an interest in her. Oh no, John, don't worry. Jace is only in love with your sister. It's no big deal, really. But i would-"

"Can you _please_ let me say something," John asked. Jia nodded her head and stood, walking towards her bookshelf on the far wall.

John turned to Jace, who seemed to be sinking down in his chair. "You… like my sister?"

"Love," Jia corrected, before turning back to her bookshelf.

"I really wouldn't call it love," Jace said, trying not to blush as red dragon scales began to creep up his neck.

"But you do in your mind," Jia said over her shoulder.

Jace slid farther down in his seat, the scales on his neck spreading up to his jaw. "I'm sorry, John. I didn't want to say anything. I thought it might ruin our friendship… Or that it would go away. Feelings usually do. Right?"

"Jace, this is great!" John smiled, patting Jace on the back. "Now all you have to do is charm Clary into dating you and Sebastian will be history!"

"Wait… what?" Jace sat up. "Are we talking about the same Clary? Plant Clary? Freckles Clary? Ginger Clary? Your sister Clary? The one you said if any man ever touched her you would use your swords to cut off the hanging fruit Clary?"

"Yes! You should date Clary! You should never touch her, like ever, but you should date her and marry her so we can be brother-in laws!" John squeaked. "You two can adopt kids, since you will never touch her, and you guys can live together in separate houses. And if you ever cheat on her I'll skin you and make you into a carpet. It'll be great!"

Jace paled slightly and laughed. He was about to say something when-

"That's going to be difficult when all he can think about is touching your sister," Jia added, coming back to sit at her desk.

"Well, it's been nice, but i really need to go and… not touch your sister. Bye!" Jace ran across the room and threw himself out the closed window, quickly growing his wings and flying away.

OoOoOoO

Teamwork Exercise Tuesday was something that Luke prided himself on organizing. On the first Tuesday of every month, all the students would gather in the arena for what was meant to be an afternoon of fun and games, but what always turned out to be, essentially, a battle to the death.

No one actually died. At least, not since Sherman Jones lit himself on fire during the great battle of 62, but that was no one's fault but his own.

The night before the event, all the students receive a letter in the mail containing the name of their partner for the upcoming match. Then, the next day, Luke would choose names from a hat and one after the other, see how many battles he could cram into three hours.

The object of the game is simple. Two people on each team. Two teams in the ring. First team to knock the other team out of the ring wins.

John stood in the ring, next to Clary and across from Jace and Maia, wanting nothing more than to go home and eat chicken in bed. It was bad enough having to work with Clary. Every time he looked at her all he saw was Simon spanking her with a dildo. And every time he looked at Jace all he saw was his own fists slamming repeatedly into that assholes smug mouth.

That made him feel a little better.

The bell rang, signifying the beginning of the fight, and John charged toward Jace.

Clary seemed to be very busy trying not to let Maia touch her. Every time she came close, Clary would dodge to the side and try to hold down her breakfast. She seemed to be trying to keep at least three feet of distance between them.

No one blamed her.

John broke another blade against Jace's skin. Each hit didn't seem to do anything but make Jace take a step back, bringing him closer and closer to the edge. But John didn't want to knock him off the three foot drop. He wanted to rip his goddamn face off. He growled and drew another sword, before smashing it against his right shoulder. The blade, again, shattered. Shards of metal flew everywhere, hitting John in the arms and face, but he didn't care. All he could think about was Jace touching his sister. John drew another sword, and this time aimed for Jace's face.

Just as the blade was about to hit skin, Jace's cheek covered itself in gold and red scales. Scales that were harder than stone and stronger than metal. John's sword shattered again.

Jace looked at him, genuinely surprised. "Bro, not the money maker please."

"You want to touch my sister!" John yelled, drawing another sword.

"Not like that," Jace said defensively. "I would only touch her in a very loving way."

" _Loving_?" John got ready to stab Jace somewhere that would hurt no matter how thick the scales grew.

"Respectful. I meant respectful." Jace said, his hands raised. "Like hand holding. Or hugging."

"Hugging!?" john stabbed forwards, but Jace caught the sword with one clawed hand.

"No hugging. Just hand holding. And maybe sometimes nice pats on the back. But only if we thought the other really earned it."

John nodded, seeming content with that answer.

"So we good bro?" Jace held out his hand. John took it, pulling him in for a hug.

"I'm still gonna kick your ass, Herondale," John whispered, before pulling away and stabbing Jace in the gut.

Jace wasn't ready for it this time, so the blade actually passed through.

"Ouch," Jace complained, yanking the sword out of his stomach. He gave John an exaggerated pouty face. "That was very rude, Jonathan. What would your mother say about this?"

John rolled his eyes, lunging forward to attack Jace again. But this time Jace was fighting back.

Jace was great at defending, since you couldn't actually kill him unless you pierced his heart, and good luck actually penetrating his skin. But when it came to attacking, Jace couldn't do much other than scratch you with his claws, bite you with his teeth, or breathe fire on you. And yeah, against any other person, they would probably be screwed. But any time Jace tried to fry John with a breath of flames, John would heal more quickly than he would burn.

Off in the distance, Clary was doing a little victory dance after having pushed Maia off the edge without having to touch her. Around her were various types of wild vines she much have grown to push the nasty dung beetle off.

Jace stared at her, clearly distracted as she hopped around, pumping her fists and punching the air. She was so adorable.

He couldn't take her eyes off of her. She was just so beautiful and adorable and-

Jace felt something sharp hit him in the stomach. He had just enough time to grow his scales and protect himself, but the momentum still forced him to take a step back.

One step back right off the edge of the ring.

OoOoOoO

After the match, John met up with Jace outside of the change rooms. Jace still seemed a bit nervous to see him, but John didn't really give a shit.

"Hey Jace, we still need to talk."

Jace nodded and approached John, obviously trying not to look nervous. "Is this still about me liking Clary? Because it's really not a big deal if I-"

"I don't care if you like her. I actually think it's a good thing. Just promise that you'll respect her."

Jace nodded.

"Not that it matters," John smiled. "I doubt my sister would want to date a loser like you."

Jace scoffed. "I got distracted."

"Uh huh, distracted by the ground hitting your face when I won, bitch!"

John walked away laughing, and Jace silently vowed to kick his ass the next chance he got.

Jace walked back into the arena and sat in the bleachers next to Clary. The next match had already begun, but Jace didn't really care about what was happening in the ring.

"So," he said, a smirk growing on his face. "You and Simon."

"Oh my god," Clary's face turned a bright shade of green. "It's really not like that. I think I need to teach him the definition of a prank."

Jace laughed, patting Clary lightly on the shoulder. "Yeah, he wasn't using that dildo quite right. Maybe one day I could stop by and show you how to use it properly," he winked.

 **Hey guys, we know it's been a while. Sorry. You probably thought that we** **abandoned** **the story. But we promise we won't ever abandon a story without telling you.**

 **Hopefully we will be able to update the next chapter soon.**

 **Hope you enjoyed. Please tell us what you thought.**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


	4. Chapter 4: Potluck Tuesday

**Yay! We uploaded somewhat on time! So happy we didn't wait more than 3 months! Anyway, enjoy the chapter.**

Potluck Tuesday

"So I hear Isabelle likes guys in white pants," Clary said as she slid her shirt over her head. She opened the bathroom door and walked towards her bed, sitting down to slip on her socks.

"Really?" Simon asked, immediately ripping off his black jeans and running to Clary's dresser and started looking through her drawers violently. He pulled out a pair of white skinny jeans that were too small for her now from the bottom drawer and slid them on.

They actually didn't fit him that bad.

Simon smiled at Clary, putting his hands on his hips like some kind of discount superman. "How do I look?" he asked.

"Amazing." Clary slapped Simon's ass as they walked out the door side by side.

Clary smirked.

OoOoOoO

They reached the cafeteria after everyone else, so the duo went to sit at their full table.

Isabelle smiled as she saw Sion approach. "Wow Simon," she said, clearly checking him out. "You look good today. Did you do your hair differently?"

Simon smirked, obviously feeling confident. "I did something differently." He twirled in a circle seductively like Shakira, doing a 180 so his ass was to Isabelle.

"Damn," she slapped his ass. Once her hand made impact, there was a loud noise like an old car starting.

Isabelle backed away in horror as brown began to spread across the back of Simon's white pants, traveling across his ass and down his leg.

Clary smile to herself. She silently thanked her brother for always keeping a generous stash of laxatives. Though she never knew why. And she didn't want to.

Clary was laughing her ass off until she saw Maia come running with the cup and straw.

OoOoOoO

Clary left Combat and Weapons class (where Miss Lightwood spent the whole class teaching everyone how to kick "vigorously" enough to... fuck, i don't know. Wow your opponent with your amazing legs? Make them surrender with your athletic calves?) and made her way to her Specialized Class. The specialized classes were made to train each student in their specific abilities, like transformation or some other shit like that. Clary, on her first day of the class, had been alone with no one else but the teacher, Robert Lightwood. He didn't know what to do, or how to teach her, since he had no experience with students with a nature ability.

"All the nature kids go to Mary Jane's," he had said. Clary shrugged, not really caring either way. She already knew everything about being a dryad.

So that day, Robert brought a box of crackers out of his desk and he and Clary sat on the floor and talked about life. Robert talked about how he was trapped in a loveless marriage with the high kicker Maryse Lightwood. Clary talked about her prank war with Simon, which was when Robert made the laxative suggestion.

So today, the two sat on the floor always, eating cherries off of a tree that Clary grew in the middle of the room for funsies. She told him about how Simon gloriously shat himself and how Isabelle may or may not have been in the splash zone.

Robert laughed at that, asking for details on how shit-covered his daughter was.

"It's really a shame both of my kids ended up as such throwaways when I'm so damn cool." Robert had the super cool power of borrowing other people's powers as long as he was in skin-to-skin contact with the person. He never bothered trying that with Clary. He said he "didn't want to meddle in any of that plant shit."

"But Alec isn't that much of a disappointment. He's an elf warrior."

"He's a sugar plum fairy," Robert said around a mouthful of cherries.

Clary almost choked. "What?"

Robert sighed. "He tells everyone he's an elf to avoid embarrassment. He's got sparkly wings and magic dust that grows sugar plums and kiwis. Don't ask why, but that's all he can grow."

"You should be proud," Clary suppressed a laugh. "Most sugar plum fairies can only grow sugar plums. He's branched out to other fruits."

"Branched out?" Robert looked dead inside. "Is that a fucking pun?"

The bell rang and Clary ran out the door before Robert could pelt her with cherries.

At lunch, Clary found her table of friends all deep in some kind of serious discussion.

"No, that doesn't make any sense," Simon said, looking up from his blood pudding. "The only reason Draco fought for the Death Eaters was because he was under the influence of his parents."

"Of course he was under the influence of his parents," Isabelle argued. "But that doesn't mean he didn't do it because he wanted to. His parents made him who is, so it was completely his asshole self that decided to fight for Voldemort."

Simon slammed his fists against the table, splattering his blood pudding all over his shirt. "HE JUST NEEDS LOVE!"

Clary sat at the table with her chicken burger when Simon turned to her. "Clary, is Draco Malfoy a villain or a misunderstood sweetheart?"

"Misunderstood asshole," Clary answered, stuffing her face with chicken. The two shrugged, seeming content with her answer, but their eyes burned with intensity of an unfinished argument.

Clary, already finished her burger, got up to throw away her garbage. Jace got up and walked beside her the whole way, not saying a word. Then when they reached the garbage, he smiled. "Fancy meeting you here," he said, flipping his hair dramatically.

Clary smiled, dumping her tray into the trash.

"So Ginge," Jace continued, not breaking eye contact. "I was wondering if you were busy this Saturday?"

Clary blushed. "No, I'm not."

"Great," Sebastian said, coming up behind her. "So you wouldn't mind going out with me."

Clary's smile faded. 'Oh, but Jace was about to ask me to-"

"No, it was nothing," Jace said, backing away. "Don't worry about it. I'll see you later."

Clary sighed, disappointed, and turned back to Sebastian.

"So," he said, smirking down at her. "About that date."

"I'd love to," Clary smiled spitefully.

OoOoOoO

Clary was so happy to be out of Mortal Subjects. Professor Morgenstern never let anyone ask any questions. And if anyone tried he would yell in their face that they were stupid for not already knowing the answer.

When Clary got to Health class, she thought for sure today would be fun. Boy was she wrong.

Her father, Luke, was passing everyone a styrofoam cup filled with one type of candy each. Everyone held their cup and sat in the bleachers, waiting for instructions.

"Alright everyone, the game is simple. Go around and trade candies with people. If you give them one, they give you one. That's the rule. Whoever collects the biggest variety wins."

When everyone stood to begin trading, Clary walked to Luke and said; "Uh, Dad? I don't have a cup."

"I know," Luke said, patting her on the shoulder. "You, unfortunately, will not be participating. Go sit down."

"What?" Clary asked. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No, of course not," Luke pinched her cheek. "Now go sit down. You'll thank me later."

Luke blew the whistle that hung around his neck. Everyone sat back in their seats and Luke waited for them to stop talking.

"Alright everyone, did everyone have fun trading your little candies?" Everyone nodded. Except Clary, of course. Luke smiled and pulled out what looked like a color chart. "Ok, everyone with the yellow jellybean please stand up." He waited as several people stood, smiling as they looked around. "Chlamydia," Luke said, checking something off on his piece of paper. "Whoever originated with the yellow jelly bean spread it to all of these sexual partners. And now you have condemned them to eternal itchy genitals." The people with the yellow jelly beans sat down, looking horrified. "That's how easily an STD can spread, people," Luke continued. "Doesn't matter if it was just a sword fight or some hotdogging. That shit spreads like wildfire."

Luke continued to list the colors and candy types, identifying which STDs they represented.

John raised his hand right after Luke identified the blue gummy bear as Syphilis.

"Yes John?"

John looked up from his cup. "I have a black jelly bean that I didn't think I had before and it's at the bottom of my cup so… was that just a mistake?"

"No, that wasn't a mistake. The black jelly bean means you have an inverted penis."

"Wait, what?"

Luke snorted. "How does your super gay boyfriend feel about dating someone with a vagina?"

John sighed, downed his cup of candy in one mouthful, and stopped talking.

OoOoOoO

Jace wheeled in his cart of raw meat.

"What the hell is that Herondale? This is a potluck, the food is already supposed to be cooked," Isabelle said.

Jace snorted. He leaned over the meat and breathed a heavy wave of fire, barbecuing the meat perfectly. He smirked at Isabelle and she made a face back at him.

"Trying to impress someone?" John asked, raising an eyebrow. "She isn't even here yet."

"Fuck," Jace muttered through clenched teeth. Je looked over at John who was standing behind the kitchen counter with covered trays in front of him. "Let me guess, you brought unprepared sushi. Trying to impress your boyfriend after he found out you have an inside out dick?"

John blushed. 'It was just a jelly bean," John said in a small voice.

"Yeah but you ate it, so it's inside you now. It's a part of you."

Clary walked into Magnus's room holding an empty plate.

"Wow, you know you're supposed to bring food for everyone else, not just show up to eat," Simon said,

Clary smiled, setting the empty plate down on the counter. She waved her hands over the plate, and vines started growing out of the ground, climbing up the counter towards the plate, filling the surface with fresh fruit. When she was done, she shot the finger to Simon. "What did you bring, Ratboy? Cheese?"

"Psh, no," Simon said as he dumped a cheese platter into the trash.

"So is there a particular reason we decided to have Potluck Tuesday?" Clary asked. "Or are we just here to eat? I'm good with either."

"Actually, this is an intervention."

"Oh thank god," Clary sighed, turning to Simon. "You need to stop wearing so much Axe body spray. It chokes me."

John cleared his throat. "Uh, actually, this is for you Clary."

"What?" Clary looked shocked. "But I'm magnificent."

"You can't go on that date with Sebastian," Denis said, setting a hand on her shoulder. "He has a pencil dick."

Clary shrugged Denis's hand off of her shoulder, clearly offended. "I'm not that shallow."

"Good," Jace smirked. "Cuz my dick goes in deep."

John immediately punched him in the face.

 **Please let us know what you thought in the reviews!**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


	5. Chapter 5: Obsessively Shadowing

**Holy shit, it's been a long time since we've updated. So sorry about that. It's just kind of hard to write together now that I (A) moved for school.**

 **But we are not letting that get in out way! It may slow us down but it won't stop us. We found the time to FaceTime today so we were finally able to get this chapter done!**

Not Stalking, Obsessively Shadowing

Clary awoke to the beautiful sound of a flute playing softly. The wind was blowing gently in her hair, waking her with its soft cold. She opened her eyes slowly, feeling so at peace, only to see Simon sitting across from her, playing his dork flute and wiggling his eyebrows.

A vine wrapped around Simon's throat, choking him violently. "What. The. Fuck. Is. This." Clary hissed, using the vine to pull him closer.

"I was j-just trying to wake you up in a nice way," Simon choked, trying desperately to breathe around the vine.

"Nice try, Lewis," she said, releasing the vines grip from his throat. Simon fell to his knees, gasping for breath. "I'm not falling for any of your damn tricks this time."

Clary flung the blanket off of her and stood, walking to her dresser to get her clothes for the day.

"Come on, Clary. I'm tired of this stupid prank war. Can't we just be friends?"

She scoffed. "Simon, I thought we agreed our friendship was on a hiatus for a while. Just because you're scared of what I'll do next-"

"I'm not scared. It's my turn remember? But I don't want to do this anymore." He extended his hand. "Truce?"

"You always ruin all my fun," she said before taking his hand and shaking.

Clary left the room after she was dressed and headed down to the cafeteria. Since Simon had woken her up early, she thought she may as well go and get John some breakfast.

After she had her wheat bagel and herb milk, she got John his usual whole pig wrapped in bacon. She smiled to herself as she lifted the giant tray that held their food. _I'm such a good person,_ She thought, grabbing a packet of Splenda for Jace.

She struggled with the tray all the way back to the dorm rooms,. She almost dropped it a few times, and finally made the executive decision to throw away the Splenda. It was just too much to carry.

Once she reached John's room, she hefted the tray onto her shoulder and opened the door.

And John was lying in bed beside Jordan, who slept over often when Alec kicked him out so he could be alone with Magnus.

Clary set the tray down on the nightstand. She leaned down to tap her brother on the shoulder. "Pst, John, wake up. I brought you brea-ah!"

John woke, startled by Clary, and pulled the covers closer to himself to cover his chest, which then pulled the covers away from Jordan, showing that he was-

"NAKED! NAKED! NAKED! NAKED!" Clary pointed at Jordan, tears welling in her eyes as, as though they burned with sin.

John sat up quickly, taking the blanket off of himself and throwing it onto Jordan to show that he, too, was…

"NAKED! NAKED! NAKED! NAKED!" Clary slapped her hand over her eyes, backing away with stumbling steps, until her legs hit something and she fell.

Fell into a bed.

Into Jace's arms.

That were now wrapped around her, spooning her.

He pulled her close and mumbled her name into her ear, clearly still asleep.

Clary struggled, waking Jace. He mumbled and pulled up his eye patches, moving aside his noise cancelling headphones. "What the fuck," he mumbled, arms still wrapped firmly around Clary. "Oh, hey Clary," he mumbled, pulling her closer.

Clary shrieked, trying to shrink away from him. "What's touching my foot?" she whimpered.

"My foot," Jace sighed, exasperated.

"What's touching my knee?" Clary whispered.

Jace sighed again. "My knee."

Clary shut her eyes, letting out a squeak. "What's touching my thigh?"

She could almost feel Jace rolling his eyes behind her. "My dick," he said, sighing.

Clary yelped, then John (now wearing pants, thank god) screamed, ripping his sister off of Jace.

Jace rolled his eyes, standing nonchalantly, exposing his completely naked body.

"WHY ARE YOU ALL NAKED?" Clary screamed, covering her eyes as Jace walked over to his dresser to put away his headphones and eye patches.

"With a body like this, it would be a crime not to show it off. You're welcome, by the way."

"So you guys just left your door unlocked while you were have a threesome?"

"Whoa whoa whoa," John said, his hands up defensively. "No homo."

Jordan smirked. "That's not what you were saying last night."

Clary let out a breathless squeak, shuffling out of the room in disgust.

OoOoOoO

Clary sat alone in the chapel, standing over a bowl of holy water and scrubbing at her eyes.

 _It burns so much. The devil has entered my soul. I can't tell the difference between the water and my tears. When will I be cleansed of the naked. When…_

Clary backed away from the bowl, her shirt now soaked. "Ok," she mumbled to herself. "I got rid of John and Jordan. Now I have to get rid of Jace." She reached for the water again, then stopped herself. "Well…"

Clary turned away from the holy water, leaving the chapel.

Jace was leaning against the door, smirking. "I came here to apologize, but I guess I should be saying you're welcome," he winked, reaching down to unzip his pants.

Clary slapped his hand away. "We're in public!"

Jace smirked. "Is that the only problem you have with this?"

"Hey guys, what's going on?" Sebastian asked, as he walked up from the picnic tables across from the chapel.

"Nothing," Clary said, throwing her arms behind her back as though she was hiding something. "So how have you been today?" she asked politely.

Sebastian smiled, ignoring Clary's awkward behavior. "Better now that you're here," he blushed a little, like a fucking pansy. Jace tried not to exhale literal fire. "Are you excited for our date today?"

Jace almost choked. "Wait, your what?"

Suddenly Maia came running over, looking like she was about to win the lottery.

"Can we help you?" Clary asked, trying her best to breathe out of her mouth. "What are you even doing here?"

Maia smiled. It was a thin, creepy smile. "I can smell it."

"Smell wh-"

"EAT SHIT, FRAY!" Simon yelled from the top floor of the chapel, dumping a bucket on Clary. She felt a sharp shove away from the downfall of actual human shit as Maia dove towards it, mouth wide open, tongue out. Clary felt a pair of muscular arms around her, dipping her slowly, but she couldn't take her eyes off of Maia, who was showering seductively in the shit. Simon looked down and immediately began to projectile vomit all over Maia, who opened her mouth even wider, falling to her knees.

Clary finally turned away from the shitshow (literally) **(AN: I feel like we've made this joke before but who cares.)** to see Sebastian leaning over her. He leaned in and they kissed. Clary didn't mind. He was a decent kisser. He tasted like cherries and-

"OH FUCK YES SIMON GIVE ME MORE!"

Clary pushed Seb away and she turned towards the school, walking away as fast as she could without running so she wouldn't literally throw up her entire fucking stomach.

OoOoOoO

In gym class, they were all getting ready to run laps, when John pined Simon up against a wall. "What the fuck, Lewis?"

"Yeah, what the fuck, Lewis?" Jace parroted from behind him.

"What? What did I do?" Simon said, trying not to shit himself as he looked up at two of the buffest guys at their school.

"This is all your fault," John growled.

"Yeah, this is all your fault," Jace repeated, slamming his fist into his palm.

"I didn't do anything!" Simon tried to put his hands up defensively but Jace slapped them back down.

"You're the reason Seb and Clary kissed."

"Yeah you're the reason."

John wound his arm back, getting ready to punch Simon right in the throat.

"Whoa whoa whoa, why is it my fault? Jace is the one that pushed her into his arms."

John dropped Simon and he fell to the floor. He turned to his one true bro. "What?"

Jace suddenly went wide eyed. "I wasn't aiming for his arms man, I was just trying to save her life. I got shit on my arm dude. Maia licked it off. I had to sterilize it," he said, holding up his right arm, which was completely charred.

"Aww man," John patted him on the back. "I'm so sorry that happened. Simon, look at what you fucking did."

Simon rolled his eyes. "Ok, fine, I'll fix it."

"How?"

Simon smirked. "By publicly humiliating him."

Simon walked out onto the gym floor and dramatically pointed at Sebastian. "Verlac! I challenge you to a duel!"

Luke sighed loudly, taking a long drag of his coffee and wished he could die.

Sebastian sighed. He didn't move, but Simon watched as his shadow reached over and grabbed Simon by the back of the pants, giving him a furious wedgy. The shadow reached up and hooked Simon's underpants onto the basketball hoop, leaving him hanging there.

Simon whined loudly, but no one was listening to him.

Luke sighed, clearly wishing he could die. He got up, mumbling something about wishing he had become a cop, and walked out, turning the lights off as he left, leaving his entire class in complete darkness.

OoOoOoO

Clary sat across from Sebastian on the patio of the nice restaurant. She reached for another slice of bread and stuffed the entire thing in her mouth, just as he asked her a question. She laughed around the mouthful of food, pointing at her mouth and began to chew awkwardly as he watched.

But then something caught her eye on the other side of the patio, behind a very large bush. She stood suddenly, swallowing the bread and began to walk around the tables towards the shrubbery.

Sebastian caught her arm, pulling her back. "Where are you going?" he asked with a charming smile.

Clary smiled down at him, not taking her eye off of what she could now clearly see as red dragon wings. "I'm going to take a massive shit."

Sebastian released her, clearly stunned by her blunt answer.

Clary strode over to the bush, giving it a wide berth as she walked around it and saw Dragonbreath and her shitty brother hiding, arguing like a couple of asshole children.

"Dude, you can't just text her now, she'll know that we're watching her."

Jace shrugged. "It's fine, she'll just think i was guessing," he said, hitting send.

Clary felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and pulled it out.

She opened the message from Jace.

 _How's the bread? 8=====D_

Clary scoffed, kneeling down behind the two boys quietly.

They finally stopped arguing and looked back up at the table where Sebastian now sat alone, picking at the bread delicately like a goddamn princess.

"Wait, where did Clary go?" John mumbled, worried.

"I don't know, man. I was watching them the whole time! It's like she vanished!"

"What if he used his shadow powers to kill her and hide the body?" Clary whispered.

John gasped, as though he hadn't considered the possibility.

"Don't be ridiculous," Jace scoffed. "I would have seen that. Nothing get past me. I have senses like a hawk. Or like a delicate feline, ready to strike at any mom- OH HOLY SHIT IT'S CLARY!" Jace and John finally turned around, realizing that the small redhead was kneeling behind them. "How did you know we were here?" Jace asked after the shock passed.

Clary smirked, nodding to Jace's fully extended dragon wings. "You have a twenty foot wing span."

Jace smirked, "pretty big, right?"

"Is there a reason you two are stalking me?"

Jace shook his head defensively. "It's not stalking. It's obsessively shadowing."

John nodded. "We were just trying to make sure this creep doesn't make a move on you."

Clary rolled her eyes, standing. "Get out of here, both of you. I can handle myself. I don't need bodyguards."

"But-"

"No buts," Clary said, holding out her finger like a scolding mother.

The two boys stood up, sighing. "Fine, whatever. Your dte was boring anyway," John said, turning to leave.

Clary began to walk back to the table, when she felt a sharp smack on her behind.

She turned to see Jace leaving, looking over his shoulder to wink at her.

 **Yay another chapter done.**

 **R isn't here so I'm posting this all by myself :'(**

 **Hopefully you guys liked it. Sorry again for the wait.**

 **Please review and let us know what you think.**

 **Also, eat shit R.**

 **xoxo**

 **-A**


	6. Chapter 6: Almost Lost to a Rat

**Omg, no way, who would have thought we would actually update before 2016 is over!**

 **Also holy shit this fic is almost a year old and we aren't even half done. We're horrible people. Like Jesus fuck.**

 **So sorry. We're trying to update more often.**

Almost Lost to a Rat and a Dung Beetle

Clary tugged on the last piece of her tree bark armor, making sure it covered every inch of her green-tinted skin. She turned to let John make sure everything was fitted properly.

"Is that really necessary?" Jace asked as he entered the room. Teammates usually shared a prep room before these team building exercises.

"Yes, it is." Clary tightened the strap on her breast plate. "I can't let that dung beetle touch me."

"Now Clary, that's no way to talk about your classmates."

Clary turned to see her mother standing in the doorway, her arms covered up to the elbows in paint, as usual.

John walked over and embraced their mother tightly. She grunted at his strength as he lifted her aside to allow the others behind her to come in.

Alec and his little brother Max ran into the room, followed by Luke.

"We came to wish you luck," Alec said, patting Jace on the back.

"For whatever reason," Max mumbled. "Who arranges these fights anyway?"

Everyone looked at Luke, who just shrugged and took a sip of his coffee. "I let Jocelyn choose"

"Who the fuck is Jocelyn?" Max asked. "She hasn't been mentioned in any previous chapters."

Everyone looked at Max as though he was crazy. Jocelyn looked particularly offended.

"Don't feel bad," he said, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Those bitches didn't mention me either."

"What are you talking about?" Clary asked.

Max just shrugged. "Nothing. Just that all of our choices and actions are being controlled by two teenage girls that think they're writing fanfiction but really they're altering our reality as we know it."

"Max, did you forget to take your pills again?" John put his hand on the young boy's shoulder.

"Don't you fucking touch me, murderer!" Max pulled away violently, stumbling towards Jace and falling back onto him. "Jace, quick, cut off his hand again before he kills me!"

"Ok," Alec said, walking towards his brother and putting him in a headlock. "I think it's time to take you back to the psych ward."

"No, you can't take me back there! The pills they give me dull my powers!"

"You don't have any powers, Max."

"Yes I do!" he yelled, kicking his feet in an attempt to escape his brothers hold. "I can see through the fourth wall! You don't understand! We're being controlled! We can't trust ourselves!"

"Max, it's ok that you don't have powers. You know we love you no matter what. You don't need to pretend like you have some special abilities."

"I'm not pretending! I can see! You're all blind! In another reality we're all demon hunters and he," he pointed viciously at John, "is a demon-blooded asshole that murdered me and tried to rape his sister and destroy the world! You have to believe me. We're all being controlled! Big Brother is watching! You can't trust yourselves!"

Before Max could continue with his rant, John strode across the room and smashed him in the head with a hammer, letting the boy crumble to the floor.

"Well that was interesting," Clary mumbled as Alec dragged his brother out, nodding at everyone apologetically.

Jace touched his toes, being sure to bend over right in front of Clary, then stood and faced her. "You ready Ginge?"

Clary rolled her eyes. "Yeah, let's go. This should be easy."

The two left the room and began walking down the hall side by side.

"So," Jace leaned towards Clary. "Did you and Sebastian… you know…" he wiggled his eyebrows.

"Ugh Jace," Clary shivered away from him. "It's none of your business."

"Come on, I just want to know how your date went,"

"Well it's none of your business."

"As your future lover, I think it is my business."

Clary spun so that she was blocking Jace's path from the arena. "Listen, Herondale." She poked her finger at his stomach, holding in the orgasmic sound she wanted to make at the feel of its firmness. "We aren't dating and we aren't ever going to date. I'm with Sebastian now. He's my boyfriend, alright? And what we do together is none of your business. Even if i do have feelings for you, that doesn't matter because you're a self-centered dick that doesn't care about anything other than getting into my pants."

Jace just raised an eyebrow. "So you admit you have feelings for me."

Clary choked down a grunt of frustration. "Fine, you want to know why I chose Sebastian over you?"

"You couldn't handle my amazing good looks? My charming voice that could bring you to orgasm? The amazing possibilities of what I could do to you in bed?"

"No. I chose Sebastian because he doesn't have a baby dick." Clary smirked, walking out to the arena to stand across from Simon and Maia.

Jace choked audibly as he walked after her. "Take that back, carrot face. Take that back or I'll make you regret it."

"How?" Clary laughed. "You gonna fuck my roommate?" Simon's eyes widened across the arena, shaking his head violently. "Go ahead," Clary continues. "Take the first half a millimeter of Simon's virginity."

Luke rung the gong, indicating that the match had begun.

Simon and Maia stood in a fighting stance, preparing for battle as Jace lunged at Clary, taking her to the ground.

"Why can't you just admit that you like me?" he roared, spitting flames.

"Because I don't!" Clary yelled back, erecting a tree between her legs, shooting Jace into the air. He caught himself with his huge dragon wings. He flew back down to the arena floor, landing on Simon and Maia with a loud crunch.

Just as Simon stood to attack, Jace swatted him down with his wings as he turned to attack Clary again.

Clary flung out her hand, and a vine sprung free from the ground, wrapping around Jace's neck, pulling him to his knees.

"You need to stop harassing me all the time," Clary hissed, taking a few steps closer. "I already told you I'm not interested. Give it a rest."

"You didn't even give me a chance," Jace choked, looking up at Clary with hurt eyes. "You gave him a chance. Why not me?"

"You really want to know why?" Clary yelled, tightening the vine around his throat.

"Why?" Jace choked back, barely able to get a word out.

"Because he actually asked me out!" She screamed, furious. Vines shot out from the ground, tangling around Jace's wrists and legs, pulling him flat to the ground. He watched as the vines went wild, smacking Simon and Maia in their faces off in the distance, knocking them out of the circle.

The dong rung, indicating the end of the match.

Clary looked up, suddenly remembering where they were, and let the vines holding Jace slither back into the ground.

Jace approached her gingerly, **(aha, get it? ginger?)** keeping a respectful distance.

"I'm sorry," he muttered. "I know I've been kind of a dick to you lately. A real, huge dick, if you know what I'm saying." He winked.

Clary sighed, exasperated.

"Ok ok, I'm sorry. For real." Jace put his hands up, as though surrendering. "I'll back off from now on. I won't make a move unless I really think you want me to. Ok?"

Clary turned to him, now smiling. "Ok. Friends?"

Jace gasped, reaching out to touch her face. "Oh god," he said in a small, guilty voice. "I burned you." His fingers brushed against the sensitive, slightly red mark on her cheek. "I'd kiss it better but I just said I'd back off," he laughed.

Clary laughed too, which only made Jace laugh more.

"Those bruises are healing pretty quickly," she said, commenting on the angry blue and purple marks that ringed his neck, wrists and ankles, along with lines of blood where thorns had penetrated. But they were all fading now.

"Yeah, I heal pretty fast," Jace laughed.

They both laughed together, loud enough that they couldn't hear Simon and Maia's pained and struggling coughs in the background and medics carried them away on stretchers.

"I can't see," Maia mumbled through broken teeth. "All I see is red!"

"My arm…" Simon wheezed. "Where is my arm?"

Jace offered his arm to Clary. "Can I buy you some platonic dinner? I may have a baby dick, but I don't have a baby wallet."

Clary squinted. "But you don't have a baby dick."

"Aha!" Jace pointed with a huge smile on his face. "You admit it!"

OoOoOoO

Jia sat at her desk, rubbing her temples in an attempt to quiet the many voices circling in her head.

She looked down again at the many letters she was sending out to the over twenty families of her students. She had considered personalizing each of them, but just decided there was no point. No amount of consolement would lessen the blow.

 _Dear Mr. and Mrs. __

 _We regret to inform you that your child, _, has been officially deemed missing as of three days ago._

 _Please remain calm. We are doing all we can to find you child, and will hopefully bring them back safe._

 _Any support you can provide would be greatly appreciated as we attempt to solve this mass problem._

 _Thank you for your understanding._

 _Headmistress Jia Penhallow._

 **Whoa, no way. what's this? Plot development? Who would have thought we were even capable of such a thing!**

 **Also so sorry about Max's character. He was just another victim of our fukery. Totally unplanned.**

 **Please review and let us know what you think. We love readying about what you guys have to say. It always makes our day.**

 **Also, don't be afraid to hate, guys. We're big girls. If this sucks let us know!**

 **I mean, we won't change anything, and we'll keep dicking around and doing whatever the fuck we want, but yeah. Let us know.**

 **We'll try to update again before the year is over... lol... maybe...**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


	7. Chapter 7: Rose Petals and Revenge

**We aren't even going to apologize anymore. We're such shit. Here's the chapter.**

Rose Petals and Revenge

Simon awoke to the wonderful smell of lavender and a peaceful breeze.

He opened his eyes to the sight of Maia lying on his bear chest. She was sweaty and smelled like rotting cheese and she still had a twig stuck in her eye from their battle with Jace and Clary. She leaned over and licked the corner of his mouth seductively, smiling to reveal brown coated teeth.

Simon screamed, shoving Maia to the floor and bolting to the nearest door, shutting it behind him. He turned to lean against the door, praying that Maia wouldn't follow. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to ignore the pounding on the door and the sharp smell of shit.

Simon opened his eyes, surrounded by darkness, and reached up to the string dangling right in front of him.

The room flooded with light, and Simon tried to contain his horror as he looked around the room. Shelves upon shelves of labeled jars, all sorted by color and size.

Simon stepped away from the door in horrified amazement, looking at all the name tags on the jars full of people's shit.

He looked over and saw that there was a small jar with flowers growing. At first he thought it was just for decoration before he saw Clary's name on the jar.

There was another jar a little farther down the shelves that was full of gold coins and shining rubies. The label read _Jace Herondale._

"Are you fucking kidding me," Simon muttered, trying to contain the urge to throw the jar on the ground. Or reach in and pocket some of the gold.

The door burst open and Maia lunged towards him. Simon squealed, turning into a rat and sprinting from the room. He turned toward what he hoped was the way out and squeezed his fat little rat body under the door.

Once he was out, he turned back into his human self, gasping for clean air.

"Looks like you had a good night," Clary said from behind him.

Simon turned and saw her leaning against the wall, smirking at him.

"What the hell?"

Clary laughed. "I roofied you and gave you to Maia. Gotcha!" She shot him finger guns, pushing herself off the wall and walking down the hall.

"You'll pay for this, Garroway," Simon called after her, wagging his fist in the air like a disgruntled old man.

OoOoOoO

Jace pushed the covers off of him and stood up from his bed, fully nude. He walked over to the communal coffee maker and poured himself a cup, waiting for John to finish in the shower.

The shower finally shut off, and a few minutes later, a fully clothed John emerged from the bathroom, towelling off his hair.

John looked up, noticing Jace's naked body, and looked away quickly, "Can you please put some pants on?"

"No."

John rolled his eyes, tossing his towels onto his bed. "This is my room too you know. You can't just walk around-"

"Pastel pink is not your colour."

"What?" John stared at Jace as though he was having a stroke.

"Pastel pink." Jace stated, as thought it was the most obvious thing. "It just doesn't suit your complexion. Maybe if you had gone for a more natural colour, like brown or gold (like me) it would suit you better." **A/N: Yes, Jace can speak in parentheses.**

"Dude, what are you even talking about."

"Uh, your hair?" Jace said, holding up his personal mirror.

John grabbed it out of Jace's nude hand, staring at the reflection of hs now luscious pink hair. He gasped, a little too dramatically in Jace's opinion, and ran to the bathroom.

He came back out with his shampoo bottle in hand and proceeded to dump out the entire bottle onto his comforter. As he shook out the last of the bottle, a clump of wet, slimy rose petals fell out, plopping onto the comforter like a big nasty shit.

John scooped up the rose petals and crushed them vengefully in his fist. "That ginger bitch…"

Jace smiled. "Wait. You didn't plan this? This was your sister?" he laughed.

"I'm gonna kill that plant eating asshole," John muttered, storming toward the door.

"Whoa whoa whoa," Jace held out his naked arm. "I have a better idea." He smirked.

OoOoOoO

Luke hated tournament days. One day a year, the school counsel forced him to hold a huge tournament for the students to test their abilities against each other.

To enter, each student had to submit a token of some sort that would be added to a large pot given to the winner at the end.

Luke sat back, sipped his coffee and tried not to fall asleep as he watched a lame battle between Simon and Maia. Simon danced around her, trying his best not to touch her as he dodged her attempts to grab his ass.

Simon shivered, reaching over and grabbed Maia by the twig. He pulled as hard as he could, trying to push her over the edge of the arena, but there wa a loud pop and Maia's eye fell from its socket.

Simon yelped, letting go of the twig. He leaned over the edge of the arena, vomiting so hard he fell off the edge.

Luke closed his eyes, letting himself doze off for a few minutes.

When he opened his eyes again, it was already the final battle. Wow, time flies when you don't give a shit.

Jace and Sebastian were circling each other, already beaten and bruised.

Jace glanced to the side, then back to Sebastian. Then to the side again. Then back at Sebastian. Then to the side again. **(Now look at your man. Now back at me. Now back at your man. Now back at me.)**

Luke looked off at where Jace kept glancing.

In the far corner of the bleachers, Clary was turned around talking to the person behind her, her entire ass in view.

"Hey," Luke yelled at Jace. "Stop staring at my daughter's ass!"

Jace turned to look at Luke just as Sebastian lunged at him.

OoOoOoO

Jace woke up in the infirmary, his shirt in tatters where he remembered shadowy claws tearing into his skin. All evidence of his wounds have faded and healed almost completely.

He sat up with a grunt, holding his stomach as though he were in pan, even though he wasn't.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" John asked, leaning over him like a worried mother, his pastel pink hair glinting in the light.

"Fine," Jace mumbled, not making eye contact.

"Aww, are you sad that you didn't win the tournament?" Sebastian asked, cockily. He was sitting on the bed next to Jace's. To his right sat Clary, and to his left was a large basket.

Seb pulled the large basket onto his lap, examining its contents. "Wow, look at this cup of gold coins and rubies that Maia submitted." He smirked at Jace and Jace smirked back.

Seb reached into the basket again, this time pulling out a small piece of paper. He unfolded the page and read aloud: "Submitted by John Garroway. The holder of this page is allowed to make my sister, Clary Garroway their slave for one day."

"WHAT?" Clary stood up from where she was sitting, about to charge over to John before Jace jumped up and grabbed her.

"Don't worry," Seb said, leaning over Jace's arm to whisper in Clary's ear. "I'd rather call you my girlfriend than my slave." He kissed her hand. "See you later, Poppy."

Seb turned to leave, scooping up his basket on the way.

Jace growled, pulling Clary closer.

Clary looked up, her lips brushing his gorgeous jaw. "It's a shame you lost, it would be interesting to be your slave for a day."

Jace smirked, leaning down to whisper in her ear. "You still can be." he nipped playfully at her earlobe, enjoying the way she squirmed. "Sorry, just had to made you blush harder than he did."

 **Wow we can't believe we actually uploaded 5 whole days before the one year anniversary of this fic. Wow, we really are amazing.**

 **7 whole chapters in a year. That's more or less one chapter every 2 months. Who would have thought anyone could be so productive.**

 **Anyway, we promise we will try to be better about uploading. And we're already writing our next fic so by the time this one is done that one will be done too and we will be able to upload once a week no problem.**

 **Please leave a review. We love hearing what you have to say.**

 **And, saying this as politely as possible, asking us to update soon will not make us write any faster. We write when we can and get the chapters up for you guys as soon as possible. We promise we aren't hording them or keeping them from you. We upload them as soon as we are done writing.**

 **Thank you**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


	8. Chapter 8: Falling for Jace

**Whoa, an update within two months of the last one. Who knew it was possible? Lol, plz don't get used to it.**

Falling for Jace

Clary awoke to the wonderful feeling of fire in her vagina. Like someone had ripped out her vaginal canal and tossed it into the deepest pits of hell. When she opened her eyes, she found that she wasn't being fucked by Satan, but was in her room.

"Good morning sunshine," said a voice to her left. "How's it feeling down under?" Simon smirked as he stood from his bed, walking over to his dresser.

"What the hell did you do to me?" Clary mumbled, trying to sit up, but that only made the burning worse.

Simon smirked, turning slowly to face his roommate. "I have given you a yeast infection."

Clary gasped, her hands coming down to cover her special place.

Simon laughed and shook his head. "Don't worry. I didn't do anything to you specifically. But throughout the last week I've been sprinkling an undetectable amount of sugar in the crotch of your panties," Clary cringed at every word in that sentence. "I knew the infection would hit you eventually. And now here we are, on this glorious morning. Me, as awesome and yeast-free as ever. You, lying there, trying to keep yourself from spewing cottage cheese. This truly is a wonderful day."

"What the fuck Simon," Clary yelled, pulling herself farther under her blankets, wishing someone would throw her into the deepest pit of hell "You don't just mess with a girl's vaginal chemistry!"

Simon shrugged, tossing a towel at her and walking towards the door. "Clean yourself up and get ready for the beach today. I have things to do."

{(|)}

Simon approached the door silently as he could, tiptoeing until he reached close enough to knock.

He raised his fists and began to bang them against the door in different places, with spaces in between each knock, like morse code.

John finally open the door, looking more murderous than annoyed. "Simon, I already told you, we aren't doing the secret knocks."

"But why nooooooot?' Simon pouted, shuffling into the room.

John rolled his eyes, shutting the door behind him. "So did it work?"

Simon nodded enthusiastically, plopping down on one of the beds next to Jordan. "It was beautiful. The whole night she was moaning and holding her vagina."

John squinted at him.

"You know," Simon continued. "Like, the painful kind of moans."

"Whatever." John shook his head. "Now you have to hold up your end of the bargain."

"Well, are you sure he's gonna-"

"Absolutely sure."

In the other room, the shower shut off. Simon hadn't even noticed it was running until the noise wasn't there anymore. After a few more moments, Jace exited the bathroom, his damp hair wrapped up in a white towel and the rest of his body completely bare. Everything was visible. All of it.

Simon immediately felt the urge to vomit. But he held it in.

Jace looked startled when he saw Simon and Jordan sitting on John's bed. But after a moment, he just shrugged and continued to his bed, where he plopped down, legs spread, and pulled a book out from under his pillow.

Simon looked at John, who gave him a look that said come on, Lewis. Pay up.

Simon sighed, hating himself, and stood up. "Wow, Jace, your penis is amazing."

"It is, isn't it," Jace agreed, not looking up from his book.

Simon sighed, knowing he had to turn it up a few notches. He focused all of his strength and moved his eyes, one inch at a time, towards Jace's dick.

He didn't want to look at it. But he knew he had to.

Then, Simon looked at Jace's dick for the first time. And… Wow.

Simon could feel his mouth begin to water. He stumbled forward, falling to his knees at the foot of Jace's bed. "She's breathtaking." He felt tears trickle down his cheek as he reached forward, hoping to at least graze it with his fingers.

Jace finally looked up from his book, his face twisted into a more than disturbed expression. "Dude, what the hell is wrong with you?"

Simon shook his head, but continued to stare at Jace's magnificent cock. "I think I'm in love."

Jace bolted up from his bed, his eye twitching as he ran into the bathroom. Once he was inside, he cracked the door and held out his hand. "John, could you hand me some clothes?"

John sobbed quietly, wiping a tear from his cheek. "I never thought this day would come." He turned to Jace's dresser and began to rummage through the drawers.

Simon stood from where he knelt by the bed, lunging for Jace's outstretched hand. "PLEASE SHOW ME YOUR DRAGON DICK! I'M HUNGRY FOR IT!"

Jace squealed, pulling his hand back into the bathroom just as John tossed the clothes through the crack in the door.

John patted Simon on the shoulder. "Good job, man. That was some pretty convincing acting."

Simon laughed nervously. "Yeah, acting. Totally acting. Yes."

John chuckled, patting Simon on the back again. "Ok, well I guess I'll see you at the beach later."

Simon nodded, glancing wantingly at the bathroom door.

John sighed. "Get out now."

8============D

Clary lay in the sand, her arms spread, her legs tightly crossed as she attempted to tan her skin into a darker shade of green.

She closed her eyes, leaned back and enjoyed the way the heat on her body made the heat between her legs feel less painful.

A shadow came over her suddenly, blocking the sun.

Clary lifted her sunglasses, squinting up at the blind tower that stood before her.

"You're blocking my sun."

Jace flexed his gorgeous arms, kissing each of his biceps. "I am the sun."

Clary let out an annoyed sigh, scooching over a few feet back into the sun before lying back down.

Jace skipped over, throwing himself onto the sand next to her. "So how was being Sebastian's slave for a day?" Jace asked, propping himself on his arm. "Or, what was the word he used? Girlfriend?"

Clary shrugged, not bothering to look over at Jace. "It was ok. I'm starting to think I could do better though."

Jace smiled, leaning over Clary. "I'm much better."

Clary finally lifted her darkly tinted sunglasses, pushing them into her hair. "Yeah. You are."

Jace blinked. Unsure of what to do. He could feel himself start to smile like an idiot. But he didn't care. He was about to say something before Clary leaned over, her lips a millimeter (haha metric system we're Canadian) away from his, and she whispered "that is, if you still want me."

Jace tried to hold in his heavy breathing, about to lean in to close the distance between them before Clary stood, walking farther down the beach. She glanced over her shoulder once, winking at him, before running into the water after Isabelle. Jace growled, lifting himself off the sand and running after the little redhead.

He felt his wings from his shoulderblades, and he flung himself into the air, scooping Clary up on the way.

"Let me go!" She yelled, kicking her feet. Jace lifted her up, holding her against him as he flew farther over the ocean.

"Not until I get that kiss." Jace pulled her closer, leaning in and pressing his lips to hers.

They stayed there for a moment, wrapped up in each other.

Then they finally pulled away, a bit breathless, and pressed their foreheads together.

"Ok," Jace whispered. "I'll let you go now." He opened his arms, letting Clary fall away from him.

"Wait, no!" Clary slipped from Jace's arms. She clawed at him, trying to get a grip on his neck, arm, leg, foot. But she just continued to plummet towards the water below.

"FUCK YOU HERONDA-"

Splash.

8======D{(|)}

Jia sighed, pressing her face against her desk.

500 students were missing. Five hundred.

That's one tenth of the school's population.

And Jia had no idea why this was happening.

And she had no idea how to stop it.

 **Hooty-hoot-hoot sexual tension between Jace and Clary.**

 **Oh, and also plot.**

 **Ok, don't worry guys, the plot will eventually become important XD**

 **Anyway, with only 5 chapters to go our New Year's Resolution is to just... just finish this story.**

 **Hope we make it.**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


	9. Chapter 9: The Inevitable Dissapointment

**What's this? We're updating weekly now? whoa**

The Inevitable Disappointment

Simon leaned into Isabelle, kissing her neck gently and lifting her legs around his waist.

"We really shouldn't be down here," Simon whispered between kisses. "The basement is off limits."

"Who cares?" Isabelle whispered, pulling him closer.

He pressed her against the wall, feeling her boobies in his handsies. His hand lowered, reaching for her—

Simon shifted his foot forward, feeling something hard under his foot.

He pulled away from Isabelle, looking down at his feet, and squealed like a little girl when he saw that what he had stepped on was… a hand.

Simon dropped Isabelle, feeling a little bad when he heard her thump on the floor.

"Simon," Isabelle whispered, putting a hand on his shoulder. "What is it?"

Simon pointed to their feet, making his girlfriend squeak and shuffle back at the sight of the body lying on the ground.

Simon knelt down, feeling for a pulse, and sighed with relief when he found one. He turned the body over, and gasped when he recognised who it was.

"Poussée," Simon exclaimed.

"Simon," Isabelle muttered, pulling at his shoulder. He turned to the left, following Isabelle's finger to the pile of bodies stacked against the back wall.

"What the hell…" Simon muttered, taking a step forward. He felt a firm hand on his shoulder, and then everything went dark.

XxXxXxX

Jace flopped down on Denis's bed, blowing smoke rings up towards the ceiling fan.

Clary sat at the foot of the bed, throwing Denis's dirty socks at the smoke before they could go far. Most of the socks then landed in Jace's mouth, but he didn't mind.

"What should we do?" Alec asked, who was tossing a ball across the room to Jordan.

"I don't know," Jordan muttered, catching the ball and tossing it to Magnus. "There's nothing to do on a Wednesday afternoon. What do you wanna do?"

Magnus shrugged. "We could go to class." The group laughed, a few quick cackles before it faded back into silence. "I don't know," Magnus sighed, tossing the ball to John, who was sitting on Sebastian's bed. "What do you wanna do?"

John crushed the ball in his hand, tossing it into the garbage. "If you guys don't shut up the only thing you'll be doing is pulling knives from each others backs."

"Hey," Jace sat up, catching one of Denis's socks mid-air. "This is Sebastian's room too."

"Yeah," Denis muttered, sitting up from where he was lying on the floor spread eagle. "So what?"

"So," Jace flung himself off the bed excitedly. "Let's look through his stuff."

Clary scoffed. "Don't be rude Jace. Just because Denis invited us into his room doesn't mean we have a right to invade Seb's privacy. Right Denis?"

"I don't care." Denis shrugged, flopping back onto the floor.

"Yeah, and why do you care, Clary?" Jace smiled nervously, walking over to what must have been Sebastian's dresser. "You don't have a thing with him anymore. You told him that. Right?" He opened the top drawer. When Clary didn't reply, Jace turned back, a pair of black underwear in either hand. "You told him you're not interested. Right?"

Clary shrugged, tying another one of Denis's socks to what looked like a sock rope she was making. "I just haven't gotten around to it yet."

"Clary," Jace threw Sebastian's underwear on the ground, pouting like a child. "We have a date on Saturday and that douche canoe still thinks you're his girlfriend?"

Clary began tying a noose into her sock rope. "Ok, ok. I'll tell him the next time I see him."

Jace nodded, obviously satisfied with the answer, and turned back to rummaging through Sebastian's dresser. The room was more or less quiet for the next few minutes as Jace giggled at some of the things he found. Finally he finished with the dresser, and moved to the nightstand.

He opened the top drawer, and immediately burst out laughing. "Oh my god," he gasped, taking desperate breaths between fits of laughter.

"What?" Magnus sat up. Everyone suddenly seemed interested. The buzz of boredom left the room as Jace stood, sliding something onto his pinkie finger like a ring.

He held up his hand, trying desperately to catch his breath, and asked, "what do you guys think this is?"

The group squinted at Jace's hand, the majority of them shrugging. "Looks like a small, clear water balloon," Jordan commented, clearly not understanding why this was so hilarious.

Jace cackled, trying to keep himself upright. He held up a tiny foil wrapper with a tear on the top. "Guys," he said excitedly, giving everyone time to realize what he was holding. "It's a condom."

John squealed with excitement like a little girl, jumping off Sebastian's bed. "No fucking way."

Alec laughed, clutching his stomach. "Clary, it's a good thing you're gonna break up with him."

"We were never even really dating," she muttered, casually fastening the sock noose around Magnus' neck.

John knelt down beside Sebastian's nightstand, opening the bottom drawer to see what other hilarious things were hidden.

"Oh my god," he muttered, all trace of humour absent from his voice. He pulled from the drawer what looked like a pink cloth, but after looking more carefully Clary realized were her underwear.

"What the hell!" She yelled, infuriated. "Where did those come from?"

"You mean you didn't leave these here?" Jace asked, taking the panties from John and holding them out with the tips of his fingers, like he didn't want to mess with the evidence.

"Of course I didn't leave them here. We kissed once, and let me tell you, that guy does not swallow his spit." She shivered, tightening the sock noose, making Magnus cough uncomfortably.

"Then where the hell did he get these?" Jace growled, his fingernails sharpening into talons.

"I don't know," Clary yelled, clearly as outraged as Jace and John were. "I lost those a while ago. I just thought Simon took them for one of his lame pranks. Or maybe he wanted to wear them."

"Why would Simon wear your underwear?" Magnus asked in a choked voice, trying to get his fingers under the noose and attempt to loosen it.

"Because they make him feel pretty. I don't ask questions," Clary muttered.

Jace growled again, and the cloth clutched between Jace's fingers suddenly burst into flames.

"Hey," Clary shouted, startled enough that her arms twitched, pulling the noose tighter. Magnus coughed, sounding more like a strangled chicken than a person. "I liked those. My mom embroidered them for me."

"Speaking of Simon," Magnus choked out, trying desperately to distract Clary so he could loosen the noose. "Where is he? I haven't seen him and Isabelle all day."

"Yeah," Alec muttered, checking his phone. "I texted her a little while ago. She hasn't replied."

"Yeah, now that you mention it," Denis added, "the school has seemed less crowded lately."

"What does that mean?" John asked, patting Jace on the back. "You think people are dropping out?"

"That doesn't explain why Simon and Isabelle are MIA."

Jace shrugged, obviously more calm than before. Though he seemed to have made some sort of agreement with himself to exchange words (or punches) with Sebastian later. "Maybe they're off making out somewhere."

Clary shook her head. "No, Simon always texts me really awkward crotch shots of Isabelle whenever they're together. It's really annoying."

Magnus finally ripped the noose from his throat gasping for air.

"I agree with Magnus," Alec said, standing from his chair. "I'm kind of worried. Isabelle always replies to my texts. Even if she's with Simon, there's no way he's lasting this long. We should go talk to someone."

"Like who? Jia?"

Alec shrugged. "It's a place to start."

 **Wow, we are attempting to build plot, who knew we were even capable.**

 **Also, we know this fic sucks now. We're just trying to get through it. We are too stubborn to abandon it.**

 **Anyway, leave review I guess.**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


	10. Chapter 10: I Think I Stepped in Shit

**Wow, we actually updated! Finally, am I right.**

 **Good thing this fic only has a couple chapters left because we're really running out of steam on this if you can't tell.**

I Think I Stepped in Shit

Clary stood outside the door of the Headmistress' waiting room. "Ok, here's the plan," she said, turning back to the huddle. "We'll wait out here. Alec, you'll go inside and seduce the secretary."

"Wait, what?" Alec looked up from his phone abruptly, shaking his head.

"Then," Clary continued, "while Catarina is distracted, we sneak into Pia's office to talk to her about the student disappearances."

Everyone nodded in agreement. Except Alec. "Wait," he countered. "Why don't we just ask Catarina to let us in? We're allowed to speak with our Headmistress."

"Alec, don't be ridiculous. We all agree that the only way this will work is if you seduce the secretary. It's a crucial part of the plan." Everyone nodded.

"But—"

"No buts," Magnus said, shoving Alec into the waiting room and shutting the door almost all the way, leaving it just open enough for everyone to hear.

Alec shuffled toward the desk, his hands shoved deep in his pockets. "Uh, hi."

Catarina looked up from her work and smiled in appreciation. "Well hello."

"So, uh, do you, uh, come here often?"

"I work here."

Alec took a shaky breath. He grabbed the coffee cup from Catarina's desk and threw the scalding hot contents onto her blouse, yelling "ABORT MISSION!" as he did.

The secretary stood, screaming in pain. She leaned forward, trying to keep the coffee spill away from her skin, and walked out of the room. "Someone should put you in Special Needs where you belong. Who the hell made you an Alpha…" she muttered as she slammed the door to the bathroom behind her.

Everyone walked into the room, some holding their stomachs from laughter.

"That was amazing Alec." Jace patted him on the back. "You're a natural."

"You know for a second there I forgot you were gay," Magnus laughed.

"Ok, as hilarious as that was, we are here for a purpose," Clary said, moving towards the Headmistress' door and knocking.

There was no answer.

She knocked again.

Nothing.

Clary sighed in frustration and flung the door open.

"She's not even here!" Clary exclaimed, walking through the office. "What the hell!"

"Maybe she's away on conference?" Denis offered.

"How very Dumbledore of her," Jace muttered.

Alec sighed. "So I flirted with that secretary for nothing?"

"Oh Alec," Magnus patted him on the back. "What you did was not flirting. Nice try though, bud."

"What do we do now?" John asked, leaning against the doorway.

"We should split up and look for clues," Jordan said, jumping up excitedly.

"Good idea, boy! Do you want a Scooby-snack?"

8===D

The group left the Headmistress' office. "What do we do now? We don't have any more leads," Jace asked, walking ahead of everyone else so he could look back at them. "We have no idea where to find Pia and we don't know what happened to Simon and Isabelle."

"We could check Izzy's room," Clary offered. "She might have left something that will tell us where she and Simon went."

"That's a good idea, but how—" Jace stumbled forward as someone behind him ran into him. Valentine stumbled back at the impact.

"Watch where you're going, you stupid lizard," Valentine spat, brushing himself off as though he had just touched Maia. "Shouldn't you idiots be in class? You can't just be wandering around whenever you want." Everyone remained quiet, obviously hoping they wouldn't forcibly get sent to class. "I can't believe I'm the smartest person in the entire world and I'm stuck teaching a horde of brainless ballsacks." Valentine spat, rubbing his abnormally large head. He scanned the group again, as though he were just noticing everyone else standing there. "Where's Ratboy and that one bitch?" he said, laughing to himself. He shook his head, obviously forgetting about their attendance, and walked off in the other direction.

"Well that wasn't suspicious," Magnus muttered.

"We should follow him," added John. "He's obviously up to something."

"Ok, here's the plan" Jace said, reforming their former huddle. "John, Jordan, Denis, you guys follow Valentine, see if you can find out what's happening with him." The three boys nodded. John slapped Jordan's ass. "Magnus, Alec, you two see if you can find Headmistress Penhallow. No making out on the way." The couple nodded, Magnus looking a bit upset about the no making out part. "And Clary and I will go to Izzy's room. We'll see if we can find anything that will lead us to them."

"You're not going off to some bedroom with my sister," John protested, crossing his arms.

"John, this is serious," Jace said, slowly sliding his hand down to Clary's ass.

John rolled his eyes, but didn't protest any further.

8=====D

John, Jordan and Denis squatted behind a wall, hiding as they watched Valentine unlock his office door and step inside. Once he was inside, the boys stepped out and went to stand by his door, pressing their ears to the wood.

"What are you guys doing?" came a voice from behind them. The three boys squealed, pulling away from the door and turning back to see Maia standing behind them. They squealed again, pressing their backs to the wall.

"Please don't come any closer," Jordan whispered. John wasn't sure if Jordan was asking Maia or God, but Maia blessedly stayed put.

"Are you eavesdropping on Professor Morgenstern? I can help," she said before shrinking down into a small and nasty dungbeetle.

The shit bug scuttled towards the door, making the boys pull away as quickly as they could, avoiding her like a plague as she ran under the door.

Once inside, John knelt beside the door and squinted into the keyhole. He didn't know why Maia bothering going inside, since they could hear Valentine almost perfectly through the door as he leaned against his desk and made a phone call.

"No, you don't understand. You're ruining my plans, you insignificant piece of shit. This needs to be done tonight. I don't care what it takes. Your life is in my hands, you sad sack of dicks. I could crush you like a bug!" He stood from his desk, and right when he feet hit the floor there was a loud crunching sound. Valentine gasped, looked down and shivered. "I'll call you back. I think I stepped in shit." Valentine clapped his flip phone closed like a teenage girl from 2004.

John clapped his hand over his mouth, trying his best not to laugh out loud.

"John, have a little respect," Jordan chidded, swatting his boyfriend in the arm. "Maia just died."

"Yeah," Denis said, obviously trying to hold in his laughter. "She was a real hero."

"Come on guys," Jordan said, getting exasperated. "She gave her life for the—" he gagged, swallowing a mouthful of vomit. "Oh my god, I can smell her from here."

John forced himself to breathe out of his mouth before looking back through the keyhole. His laughter quickly died. "Guys, he's gone."

8=======D

Magnus waved his hand over the lock of the door, listening for the click to make sure it unlocked. He smiled at Alec as he opened the door and slid inside.

"Magnus, wait!" Alec said, following him reluctantly. "We can't just break into the Headmistress' private chambers. What if she's in here? What if she's… naked?"

Magnus scoffed, patting his boyfriend on the head. "Are you really so afraid of the female anatomy?" he laughed. "Relax. She's obviously not here if we haven't seen her yet."

"What if she's in the bathroom? You know, powdering her nose, or taking a soft shit, or whatever girls do in there."

"Yes Alec," Magnus agreed sarcastically. "Pia is in the bathroom, taking a shit, reading our minds as we break and enter her private quarters and is choosing to continue her dump in silence."

Alec rolled his eyes, but said nothing.

The two turned back towards the room and began to look around. They both immediately noticed that the room was in shambles, the bed sheets and pillows scattered all over the room.

"What do you think happened in here?" Alec muttered, picking up a broken champagne glass from the floor.

"It looks like there was some kind of struggle." Magnus bent over and plucked something off the floor. "And I have an idea of who's responsible."

"That's Valentine's tie," Alec said, stepping forward to take a closer look. "I've seen him wear that ugly thing a hundred times." He ran his thumb over the ugly pattern of brains wearing christmas hats. The tie was ripped right above the knot. Someone had obviously torn it from his neck in a hurry.

"We need to show this to the others."

8=========D

Jace shut Isabelle's door, not bothering to lock it behind him. "So where to next? If we couldn't find anything in her room, should we just go and check Simon's?"

"I guess, but I feel like I would have seen something," Clary shrugged, heading down the hall to her bedroom.

"You haven't seen Simon since this morning. Something could have happened."

Clary just shrugged, opening her bedroom door. "I guess."

They stepped inside, and Clary immediately went to check in and around Simon's bed.

"What's this?" Jace asked, picking up a small envelope from on top of Clary's pillow. Clary just shrugged, returning to searching Simon's things as Jace opened the letter. "'My beautiful Poppy,'" he read aloud. "'I can't thank you enough for our time together. I know this is a bit soon in our relationship, but I feel the need to open my heart to you.' What the hell is this, Clary? I thought you were ending things with him?"

Clary looked up, obviously confused by the letter. "We went on two dates. One of them was because he won my slave rights. What the hell." She snatched the letter from his hands, scanning the contents. "How did he even get this in my room?"

"Well maybe he left it here from the last time you invited him into your bed. Since he's so ready to open his heart to you, maybe you two are closer than you let on!" Jace yelled back, his voice escalating in volume as he got more worked up.

Clary shook her head. "No, Jace, seriously. I have no idea how this got in here. This is honestly a little creepy."

"Yeah, whatever," Jace scoffed, pushing past Clary and storming out of the room.

He walked all the way back to his own room before his head was clear enough to consider that Clary may have been telling the truth. She did sound rather creeped out by the letter…

Jace turned around, not even bothering to close his own bedroom door as he ran back to Clary's room as fast as he could, hating himself with every step for leaving her alone.

When he finally reached Clary's room, he found the door wide open, her room full of wild and violent vines growing out of every crevice and crack in the room. The dresser was flipped on its side, the closet door flung, the room a mess. And Clary was gone.

 **Whoa, the plot that we started one whole chapter ago is getting** **thicker**

 **Please review, we love hearing what you guys have to say!**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


	11. Chapter 11: The Walking Not So Dead

**Holy shit we finally updated. Who knew it would ever happen**

The Walking Not So Dead

Jace swore under his breath, then again, louder when he realized no one could hear him. He slammed his foot into the bed frame, then took out his phone and texted the others to come to Clary's room.

Jace sat down on Clary's bed, trying to keep his breath even as he waited for the others to show up.

Jace looked up when he heard a soft knocking. He stood from the bed and flung the door open, expecting Alec or John, but was surprised to see Sebastian standing in the doorway with a bouquet of wildflowers. He looked up bashfully through his dark hair, only to see Jace standing before him. The fake fuckboi expression melted from his face when he saw the blond standing before him. Jace smirked, raising his fist and slamming it into Sebastian's face.

Sebastian staggered back, his hand cupping his cheek. "What the hell was that for?"

"What do you think you're doing showing up at my girlfriend's door?"

" _Your_ girlfriend?" Sebastian laughed, taking a step into the room. "You've never even been on a date with her!"

"Well you've never kissed her."

"You kissed my girlfriend?" Sebastian raged, swinging his fist at Jace but missing.

"She's not your girlfriend, sweetheart. She wouldn't date someone with a babydick like you," Jace smiled.

Sebastian growled and lunged at Jace, knocking him to the ground and holding him by the throat as he smashed his fist into his face. Jace used the momentum from the punch to throw Sebastian to the ground, straddling him and grabbing him by the collar as he brought his fist back for a punch.

"What the hell is going on here?" Alec's voice came from the doorway.

Jace looking up. "Oh hey," he said, faking a smile.

"Jace, get off of him."

Jace rolled his eyes. "Fine, we won't fight," he said, swinging his fist into Seb's just before he stood.

"What's going on? Where's Clary and why is Sebastian here?" asked Magnus, pushing his way past Alec through the doorway.

"He kidnapped her!" Jace said, pointing his finger at Sebastian like a child blaming his brother for breaking the window. "He left her a creepy note and she didn't know how it got in her room so he must had kidnapped her!"

Sebastian rolled his eyes, throwing his hands into the air. "I came by this morning to give her the letter but she wasn't there so I asked Simon to leave it for her. I was just coming back now to see if she was back when I found you standing here alone in her messed up room. Kind of suspicious is you aske me."

"Don't turn this around on me, Verlac. I was just coming back to apologize after we got into this huge fight and I stormed off."

"Wow, so not only were you here when the crime happened, but you also had a motive," Jordan said, stepping into the room, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

John put his hand on his boyfriend's shoulder. "So either you kidnapped my sister or you left her alone to be kidnapped and possibly murdered?"

Jace smiled guiltily. "It was the second one." Everyone sighed. There were many eye rolls and one attempted slap. "Ok come on guys, it was obviously Sebastian. He wanted Clary all for himself! Also he has super evil shadow powers. Who else could it be?"

"Valentine," said about four people.

Jace squinted. "What? How?"

"He went missing right before Clary was kidnapped," said Alec. "We heard him making evil plans—"

"And he killed Maia," Jordan interjected.

"Jordan, no one cares," Alec continued. "We know it's Valentine. So you can stop blaming Sebastian and we should work together to find Clary and the others."

Sebastian nodded. "I agree."

"Well I don't!" Jace pouted.

"Um guys," Denis interjected, standing just outside the doorway. "Although this conversation is very interesting, I found this trail of flowers and moss just outside the doorway that leads to the basement, and I know that because you idiots have been arguing for so long that I've had time to follow the whole trail and come back. So if anyone is really interested in finding Clary, just let me know."

 **OoOoOoO**

The group creeped down the stairs of the forbidden basement in single file. Though they knew they were on a tight schedule, several hundred people's lives being on the line and all, but the group took the few needed minutes to arm themselves just in case. Meaning everyone stood around for about 5 minutes while Alec ran to get his bow because he could never fucking bring it with him.

Ugh. Bitch.

"Does anyone hear that?" muttered Jordan, who was at the front of the line.

"No, Jordan," Alec snapped. "Not all of us have dog hearing."

"Oh right, sorry I forgot, sugar plumb," Jordan quipped back. He turned around to highfive John before continuing down the seemingly never ending stairs.

Alec growled, chucking a small plum at Jordan's head, which he seemed to have pulled out of nowhere.

"Hold on, I think I hear it," John mumbled as they got closer and closer to the basement (which for some reason was built several stories below the school.)

The door finally came into view as they rounded a corner, light streaming through door which was left ajar. Jordan pushed the door open and stepped inside.

Once everyone was inside they saw that the basement was full of all the missing students! **(A/N: guys, I'm sorry we're just so done)**

Jordan leaned in to whisper in John's ear. "What do we do now?"

Right as the first sound left his mouth, every head in the room snapped towards them.

"Shit," said everyone.

"We have to hold them off long enough to find Valentine and figure out how to wake them up," Magnus said, calling out to the group. "Just remember not to hurt anyone too badly!"

"Where's Alec?" Jace asked.

"I think he went to find Isabelle," said Denis.

Everyone split up and threw themselves into the fight, making sure not to do more than knock people out.

John found Jace deep in the crowd, trying to hold off all of the student zombies. "We need to find Clary," he said, pulling Jace towards the door at the back of the room. "I think she's this way."

Jace nodded, allowing himself to be dragged away by John as he turned to call back to Magnus. "Where's Sebastian?" he yelled over the noise of battle.

Magnus rolled his eyes, smashing a rock into someone's head. "I think he went that way," he said, pointing in the opposite direction of where John was dragging him.

Jace ran with John to the back room. They pushed the door open to see Clary lying on the ground, unconscious.

"Where's Valentine?" John asked, right before there was a sharp thudding sound. John dropped like a stone to the ground.

"Valentine's not here," said Sebastian, stepping over John's limp body.

Jace gasped. "I FUCKING KNEW IT!"

"Yeah, it's a shame you couldn't convince your idiot friends. Then you might have stood a chance."

"What did you do to Clary?"

Sebastian shrugged. "I roofied her. Actually kind of funny, she made it in potions class and gave it to me. Then I brought her back here and, well, I don't kiss and tell."

"You fucking rapist," Jace growled, lunging at Sebastian, but he vanished before he could grab him.

He reappeared a few feet away, black mist surrounding him as he grew slowly, becoming more shadow than person. He swung his huge fist at Jace, knocking him into a wall.

He slid down, hitting the floor with a groan, struggling to stand.

"Aww, what's wrong," Sebastian goaded, grabbing him by the throat and lifting him off the floor. "Can't you turn into a full dragon, little lizard?"

Jace growled, trying to swipe at the shadow monster with his claws. Sebastian laughed, flinging Jace across the room. His back hit the wall, knocking the air from his lungs.

"Or maybe you're just jealous that I got to taste her first."

Jace stood, trying his best to breathe deeply. From the corner of his eye he could see John slowly waking up, rolling over on his side. He exhaled harshly, seeing the smoke rise from his nostrils as he stepped towards Sebastian. With each step he grew, his wings unfolding from his back, his teeth sharpening. Suddenly Jace stood before Sebastian in full dragon form. And somehow, through all that scale and tooth, he smirked.

Seb, the big bad demon, now a good three stories shorter than Jace, stumbled back.

Jace stepped forward, reaching down with his long neck and ripping him apart with his sharp teeth.

When the deed was done, Jace felt himself shrink back to his regular size, his teeth no longer sharp, his wings no longer expanded. He walked over to Clary, scooping her into his arms.

John finally stood, rubbing his head as he ran towards her sister. "Jace, give me my sister."

Jace held Clary close to his chest protectively. "Why?" he asked, sounding a bit offended. "I saved her."

"I know you did dude, and I'm really grateful, but you're completely naked and your dick is on my sister."

Jace felt his face heat up as he shoved Clary into her brother's arms. "Right, sorry," he muttered.

The two walked out of the room together to find everyone standing where they had left them, in a room wrecked with bodies slowly waking up from their spell. Most of their group was gathered in the far corner of the room.

Magnus was leaning against a wall talking to Denis. "Everyone seems to be waking up. It's a good thing we didn't do much more than knock them out."

"What?" Alec called from across the room, standing near a pile of burning bodies.

"Alec, what the fuck!"

Alec shrugged. "Oops."

 **Thank god it's finally over.**

 **You may think that this doesn't seem like an ending. But it is. It's over You can fill in the blanks where you want but this is the end.**

 **We might write an epilogue one day, but don't expect it any time soon.**

 **We really just ran out of steam on this one guys. It was really hard to write this last chapter but we pushed through it.**

 **Thanks for reading. We're excited for you all to read the new stories we have planned.**

 **xoxo**

 **-R &A**


End file.
